Portland, Maine is not a med-high COL area. It below average COL. OP needs a budget and realistic life expectations. There's nothing in OP's post that says how much they are being paid compared to market value. Considering their absolutely huge perks, they've got total compensation close to $100,000 (they have 5 weeks PTO, so I'd estimate it's actually more than $100,000 total compensation).

Edit: I misread my source- Maine is overall lower than average. Portland is slightly above average. In 2018 when OP moved there, it was about average, maybe slightly above. Unless they bought their home in the last 12 months, they very likely made out like bandits buying a home using NYC salaries.

COL is not the problem for OP. They're making HCOL salaries and living in at WORST a medium cost of living area.