Where is the "there" that you put money into? The settlement account of the IRA or somewhere else?

You need to wait longer for the funds to clear

Wait one more trading day. Mutual funds like FZROX settle one day faster than ETFs and stocks. The first "cash available to trade" is for ETFs and stocks, not mutual funds. Also, a new account, holidays, new bank, etc. can delay deposit availability.

Yes the IRA’s settlement account

I mean id guess this is just because its a holiday weekend. Give it until next week. Id it isnt sorted by tuesday can call. But you added these funds on Thanksgiving and now its Sunday. This is like a bank, they have days off.

That might be it? “Account value”, “Cash available to trade”, “Settled cash” are all $541. “Available to withdraw” is the only one that is $0.

The money isn't fully there yet. Such transfers take time to be trusted that they've actually occurred. This is money, after all.

The last thing they want is for the trade to occur and to have some oddity occur meaning the money didn't really get transferred.

If it says “cash available to trade” then it’s ready. They don’t need to wait for it to clear. This is likely because it’s the weekend

Fast forward a few days and I still can’t trade it for FZROX, but something weird just happened: my account just loaded up with FDFIX, FIBUX, FLAPX, FITFX, and FLXSX even though I authorized none of them. Sure enough, the total there adds up to 541.66 even though the core fund also says 541.66.

Something isn’t right. Have you called?

Not yet though I probably should. It’s like a certain allocation was already picked for me although my original understanding was that I would select it.