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foo_trician t1_jab7p06 wrote

if she is smart financially, she has probably had a lawyer ensure he is entitled to not much.

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waynekop OP t1_jab83p8 wrote

She is not a dumb women. Honestly she's outsmarted my dad my entire life. How can I help protect him?

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waynekop OP t1_jab7rhv wrote

What and how could she hide it?

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theoriginalharbinger t1_jab8fch wrote

Prenup, sheltering assets with her family, using pre nuptial assets to make the higher risk investments that grow in value, etc.

When there are 7 figures at stake, usually the attorneys get a chunk.

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waynekop OP t1_jab8t23 wrote

No pre-nup at at all, but she used a gifted property (before marriage) as collateral for the 2nd property

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determinwhat t1_jacljki wrote

I've read other threads like this. Did he invest in the property at all, say with money he earned or doing projects/improvements with his labor?

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waynekop OP t1_jacnlov wrote

He's been paying $300 a month the entire time with the total beiny roughly 80k over the years. He does all the home repairs and improvement work around the house using his own money. They built an additional garage addition on the house using both their money and a lot of his labor

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lakehop t1_jadg738 wrote

He should be sure to tell his lawyer all of this. Any work he did and money he paid on both houses. Write it down in advance and show the document to the lawyer so you don’t take too much time explaining it, lawyers time is very expensive. Whatever the lawyer says, do.

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hijinks t1_jab8pv2 wrote

that's why he'll need a lawyer to help find anything hidden.

My friend is a divorce lawyer in NY and he always says people try to hide finances from others which is a giant mistake. The one thing judges hate more then anything in a divorce is someone trying to hide money.

I'd at least pay for a consultation to see about the laws in your state dealing with divorce. For example the 25y they were together the retirement money might be considered joint property to split.

If he has concrete examples of what is his and what isn't then maybe they can split things without spending a lot of money on lawyers and battling.

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waynekop OP t1_jab9728 wrote

This is great, thank you. This is why I've told him the 1st step is a laywer. But I just want ammo to go into the meeting with the laywer with so I'm not shooting into the dark

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waynekop OP t1_jabbnwx wrote

He has a record of "paying rent" via checks to my grandma in law ($400/mo over 25 yrs), but how does he prove the thousands he's spent on home renovation/repairs/maitance and remodels over the years?

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Motor-Farm6610 t1_jabpy7n wrote

How did he bankroll renovations with no job? He's probably not entitled to get that back, but states differ some.

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waynekop OP t1_jacfqvr wrote

He's had a job throughout the marriage. He's been unemployed since covid basically

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determinwhat t1_jacnvm4 wrote

I hate reading this, it reminds me of things I saw friends go through in the aftermath of 2008. It's good he's got his son backing him up. Watch out for his lifestyle, drinking not going out, doctors prescribing painkillers.

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