“Adams was spotted mingling with bevies of tipsy conservatives, seeming quite at ease as he yucked it up with various Proud Boys, insurrectionists, and Putin-admirers of varying shades of Caucasian. “Adams is one of us, and we couldn’t be more happy with the success he has had in infiltrating the NY Demo-rat establishment”, regaled one party goer wearing a shirt emblazoned with “DON JR 2028 ERIC 2036 IVANKA 2044 BARRON 2052”, who wished to remain anonymous.

As the band started playing a medley of tried-and-true 80s rock classics, Adams could be seen elbowing his way through the crowd of pasty conservatives towards the dance floor. “If I don’t hear ‘Boot Skootin Boogie’ in the next ten seconds…”, Adams yelled at the surprised musicians on stage, “…I’m calling in the New York City Fire Marshall!”.

The band looked at each other nervously, and then without missing a beat, launched right into a rollicking cover of the country-rock classic. “Next I want to hear the latest Kanye West!”, a tipsy Adams shouted over the guitar solo.

Hearty laughs were had by all.”