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Turbulent_Link1738 t1_iy3wn95 wrote

The most these efforts will do is just put criminal records on people. It’s an education issue. People are born mindless babies and just need to be taught and reinforced these issues. But we can’t control what a child in another country is learning.

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swine09 t1_iy3xdqr wrote

You know what else the criminal justice system can do? Keep abusers away from the people they’re abusing. That saves lives.

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Turbulent_Link1738 t1_iy41cbm wrote

does it? these people rarely go to jail, and it's never for long. even orders of protection are flimsy at best because they always get violated with little to no consequence. you can't put someone in prison for life because someone is scared they'll be attacked, because if you did, you'd be putting hundreds of thousands of people in prison for life in this city alone.

people need to be educated from childhood to not be abusers, and to learn the signs of abusers to stay away from them before the attachment is formed.

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swine09 t1_iy42hwy wrote

They’re far from perfect, but even with low enforcement (I don’t know the stats for NY), some people benefit. Example from someone I know: spouse gets locked up, she is able to move and get a divorce while he’s incarcerated, with an order from the judge to keep her address confidential so he can’t find her when he gets out. She’ll be informed when he’s released next year, but at least for now she’s safe. She has a chance to go to therapy, set up a support system, protect her kid. That matters.

Another example statistically is from when states pass laws (following the federal law) that ban people convicted of domestic abuse offenses (or temporarily for those under protective orders). The enforcement of those laws is obscenely low, but rates of IP homicide still go down. It’s simply making it a little harder to kill. That doesn’t save everyone, but it saves some people.

I agree that we need more education on healthy relationships! We can do many things to combat IPV. And I also think criminalization has serious drawbacks/blind spots. But we can’t just give up on doing anything about adult victims.

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StrngBrew t1_iy4oxio wrote

People aren’t being put in prison because someone is scared of being attacked, it’s because they literally were attacked.

And sure, you need to educate young people on abuse. That’s a fine idea. But how does it help someone being literally abused right now?

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idratherbeintamriel t1_iy5mc5z wrote

Don’t know why you’re getting downvoted. I had to escape an abusive relationship and this was my experience to a T.

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Turbulent_Link1738 t1_iy5omx1 wrote

Because people just don’t know the reality of abusers. My dad is one. Him going to jail for 2 years will only make it worse for my mother.

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idratherbeintamriel t1_iy5osdz wrote

They gave my ex an anger management class and then he stalked me for almost two years. I had to move from the Bronx to Brooklyn in the dead of night to get away.

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mowotlarx t1_iy4280a wrote

>The most these efforts will do is just put criminal records on people.

It'll put criminal records on domestic abusers. Good. They deserve it.

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trashpandarevolution t1_iy4cm4u wrote

This is the most privileged white people shit I ever heard

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ProfShea t1_iy5705n wrote

I would guess the tough on crime measures more likely to affect poor people is the more privileged answer than what the top dude/lady is saying.

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Daddy_Macron t1_iy4a00b wrote

> It’s an education issue.

And where does this cultural relativism end? They're not incapable of learning how to live in another country for God's sake. That's just infantilizing them. When they come to this country, they learn to follow our other laws like traffic laws and laws regarding sending their children to K-12 school. Why not laws protecting women from abuse and assault?

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mowotlarx t1_iy4cgjc wrote

Because it's easier for this person to be xenophobic and deflect on the real issue, which is rampant domestic abuse that is underreported and largely unpunished.

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