If it's a woman, I'm not getting near that cause she's either gonna think I'm there to take advantage or she's a psycho trying to get attention. If it's a dude, I'm not gettin near that cause he's clearly not in a good place and might go from sad to violent at the drop of a hat. If it's anything in between, I'm not getting near that cause I probably don't know some farfetched rule about how to talk to them and they'll get me fired somehow. If it's a kid, I'm not getting near that for obvious reasons.

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The only time I'll address a crying is if it's someone chopping onions cause you can apparently fix that by chewing gum