Submitted by slantes19 t3_10jomnb in nottheonion
Comments
the_simurgh t1_j5nkue3 wrote
i was just about to ask if they brought it or if they bought it in the store. either way these assholes should do time.
rottenxsushi t1_j5lszv3 wrote
"All four suspects were taken into custody on allegations of physical harassment."
Far from being a powerful enough charge. That is a summary infraction. For vandalism and throwing animal urine on a person, they will each receive fines of $300. Littering carries a heavier fine.
moldyfishfinger t1_j5mhih0 wrote
I'd sue each of them in claims court for emotional distress. That could add up
WermTerd t1_j5lrqn5 wrote
Man, I bet she was pissed!
InternetPeon t1_j5mcu9m wrote
If you think she was pissed urine good company now.
DraziBlack t1_j5lulww wrote
It is my recent understand that she will now start ovulating.
AtLeastThisIsntImgur t1_j5mdioi wrote
Use some tear gas to cancel it out
Blood_Jesus t1_j5mygec wrote
What address?
Despot_of_Morea_ t1_j5o96j2 wrote
"Jarate!"
starfishannihilator t1_j5oubcd wrote
Keepin it classy in Pensyltucky
[deleted] t1_j5lwi5n wrote
[deleted]
[deleted] t1_j5lwny6 wrote
From the sporting goods section of walmart
goinmobile2030 t1_j5o2ngp wrote
They need a good wuppin...
BeetlesMa t1_j5ortz0 wrote
Again?
Kind_Bullfrog_4073 t1_j61tyi2 wrote
Thought that battle ended in 1863
cdale13 t1_j5mcwdi wrote
Four brave men, who struggled here, have consecrated it, far above our poor power to add or detract. The world will little note, nor long remember what we say here, but it can never forget what they did here.
WintertimeFriends t1_j5p2jrv wrote
God I fucking hate reddit
Fake_William_Shatner t1_j5ls18c wrote
I'm sure the gag is to attract amorous Bucks to pursue the ladies when they venture out of the store. It's all fun and games until the paternity test.
StillHere_420 t1_j5lpqpo wrote
That’s just Hunter flirting
oooriole09 t1_j5lo0ur wrote
Probably not as onion-y if you’re rural. Walmart sells it, so I imagine they just thought it was funny to “prank” poor folks in the parking lot. Glad their dumbasses were caught.