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Arigato_MrRoboto t1_iwoh78e wrote

>I don’t know if you know—vampires are cool people, are they not? But I’m going to tell you something I found out. A werewolf can kill a vampire. Do you know that? So I didn’t want to be a vampire anymore. I wanted to be a werewolf.

Finally, some coherent policy.

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drtaylor t1_iwok9os wrote

But completely ignores the Zombies, it is an important political group.

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GetStable t1_iwplpxk wrote

Republicans have secured the zombie vote. There's no point in committing resources to a core demographic.

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yallxtrippin t1_iwsr904 wrote

It's sad they propped him up like that. Herschel Walker's image will never recover. The republicans know he's dumb as fucking rocks, though mostly because they think that about all black people. And anyone else who ever had a shred of respect for him will lose it. At least he has kids.

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CaoCaoTipper t1_iwpma70 wrote

I’m totally picturing a What We Do In The Shadows style campaign meet-up now with his zombie, ghoul and vampire constituency.

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ChuckBorris187 t1_iwpq5tv wrote

That'd make for a funny season, US style elections in WWDITS.

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CaoCaoTipper t1_iwpqdgm wrote

That’s actually brilliant. A vampire making an I’ll-conceived run for governor but ends up getting further than expected and not knowing what to do.

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ChuckBorris187 t1_iwps0sw wrote

Let's start writing spec scripts and selling them to Hollyweird.

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Arizona_Slim t1_iwq6qc2 wrote

Especially since government buildings are only open during the day 😬

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MR___SLAVE t1_iwpwqtw wrote

He would probably think The Walking Dead is a documentary.

"Like I was watching a story on this great state of Georgia and did you know you we had to like fight Zombies? I thought it was really cool how they just keep on comin, kinda like me when I played ball. Like why don't they stop? And they seem to not waste anything, like why don't we eat people? There are so many. You know some people look like they could actually be good. I once heard it's like pork. I actually really like pork..I think I would make a good Zombie."

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guyonlinepgh t1_iwsdniu wrote

What about Frankensteins, Herschel? WHAT ABOUT FRANKENSTEINS?

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(Don't go nerdy on me, I know it's the Frankenstein monster. A piece of fiction, rather like werewolves and vampires.)

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martiancannibal t1_iwsp69g wrote

Yes, the ever-expanding, yet largely neglected zombie demographic. Should they all turn out on election day, there could be a massive shift in America's political orientation.

Possibly due to propaganda, though more likely due to nibbling on opponents.

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popejubal t1_iwol7on wrote

I gotta say, I think he’s an idiot but I can’t disagree with anything he said on this specific subject.

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Crizbibble t1_iwpbzng wrote

I like him coming clean about being a blood sucking vampire (leech) but I’m not sure, even fictionally, he can turn into a werewolf as they were two different species. Sure sure the vampire and werewolves hybrid but he would need to be birthed by a vampire and werewolf with the blood of Covinus so that’s not probable. Even when this idiot talks about fiction he gets it completely wrong.

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VoidHuntG03 t1_iwqgbj4 wrote

Nah just hit up my boy Falion to get a ritual done to remove the vampirism then drink a goblet of werewolf blood and you're good to go.

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tlumacz t1_iwpzwzw wrote

I mean, think about it, Kate Beckinsale or Erwin Leder? To me, the choice is simple.

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popejubal t1_iwqekvr wrote

I’m pretty sure a German submarine could also kill a vampire.

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WexfordHo t1_iwojfe8 wrote

The good news is that stage 3 CTE is um… self-limiting.

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two_itchy_balls t1_iwomzyj wrote

I don't understand how he's still breathing. He must be mush from the brain stem to the frontal lobes.

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JetKeel t1_iwopxls wrote

You either die a vampire, or live long enough to be a werewolf. Or something like that. Or vice versa.

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dbx999 t1_iwoizvk wrote

I’m pretty sure a vampire can kill a werewolf

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bearsheperd t1_iwoorg1 wrote

Oh man see you gotta remember, werewolves are only strong when they are transformed. Vampires are strong 24/7, well except In the sun. So a vampire can easily kill a werewolf on a moonless night. Werewolves are just regular dudes without the moon. The vampire just has to worry about the werewolves they are trying to kill having UV lamps.

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dirtmother t1_iwoucx6 wrote

The relation to the full moon to werewolves is relatively recent, mostly added so black and white movies had an excuse to have well-lit night scenes. Most werewolf mythology pre-Hollywood involved being able to change into a wolf at will via witchcraft, or a curse that would randomly transform them. So more than one night a month.

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dbx999 t1_iwopukt wrote

Now that you put it that way, this Hershel Walker might really be onto something here.

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12345623567 t1_iwuvq1i wrote

Werewolves are equipped with thick lumberjack shirts and bushy beards 24/7. Vampires have, what, pasty skin and a cape?

Obviously the hypervirile werewolves will beat the effeminate vampires, how is that even a question.

/s

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Dzharek t1_iwotvjf wrote

Depends on the setting, in the World of darkness setting the werewolf are one of the few things that have no problem giving a vampire true death.

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semiomni t1_iwpawso wrote

As I recall werewolves range from vastly more powerful than a young vampire, to barely a threat for older ones.

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dbx999 t1_iwou4a6 wrote

How’s a werewolf gonna kill a being that can fly and shoot a silver bullet

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12345623567 t1_iwuw622 wrote

Are we going to have to have the "Batman with prep time beats Superman" convo again?

A werewolf in melee range of a vampire fucks shit up, otherwise it depends on who spots who first.

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dbx999 t1_iwoq5qa wrote

He’s definitely locked up the werewolf votes.

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pressedbread t1_iwowf2h wrote

I'm not sure sure if this is better or worse than his abortion stance.

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curious_dead t1_iwpji7t wrote

Walker: "The culprit left his victims bloodless and left a cape with the name Dracula on it. The suspect is most likely supernatural, a mummy."

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Justice_Prince t1_iwq9ss2 wrote

I remember having this ninja tyrtles audio play on cassette, and at one point April is reporting on some break-in at a tech lab, and says, "experts say it could have only been the work of ninjas" and that line just stuck with me. I just imagine this oufish detective kicking around a crime scenes saying "yep must have been ninjas."

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curious_dead t1_iwqdg95 wrote

Lol, that's so specific. But that's totally a line I can see in a kid's show.

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