I love weed. I love bonfires. Hell, I hate to not bath but sometimes I miss a shower or two, depending on how life goes. I barely even have much body odor, people are surprised.

But goddamn, years ago during a deep depression I didn't shower for around 2 weeks. My hair, my skin, it was like a snake shedding, or some invertebrate shedding it's exoskeleton. It all gathers and collects. Also, my balls smelled like ass, and my ass smelled like balls and ass.

Sorry for such a detailed description. My actual point is: collect samples of his body to see the microbial craziness that's going on, hose him down with a giant fire truck's hose, then smoke a giant bowl with MC Dirty Ganja over here