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Bender3455 t1_jbqcbtj wrote

No they didn't. There's a big difference between dressing for success and being a racist. His comments are in direct regard to him "looking like a thug" if he chose certain hairstyles, and that that would hinder his success. It's the same as if my daughter wants to put oversized gauges in her ears, or get a neck/face tattoo. There are things that people (kids) do that can hinder their success, and it's our job as parents to prepare them for these situations, whatever they eventually choose to do.

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Important-Ad-2242 t1_jcgnkwi wrote

At this point it seems deliberate that your steering away from the fact it was based on his ethnicity - nothing to do with “dressing for success”. If this was a conversation about “dressing for success” there never would’ve been a comment that he would look like a thug- just no. Comments like this attempt to frame the issue as if they were merely giving advice re non ethnic issue, if she had said “it might be a good idea to wear a tie” etc that would be a different story

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Bender3455 t1_jcgsmi5 wrote

I really wish we could talk in person, as I'm just an "internet stranger" posting an opposing viewpoint as it is right now. Anyone that knows me knows that I strive for equality for everyone, regardless of race, sex, gender, etc etc. I agree with you, yes, I'm steering it away from his ethnicity, but thats because I don't think it's ethnicity based, even though, granted, it's a more common hair style for African Americans than other races. My own brother was advised not to wear JNCO pants in the late 90's because my mother said he'd look like a thug. But don't forget, I mentioned that we're thankfully getting past the 'hair styles as a gauge of character', and thats for all races. But all that to say, what I'm really upset about, is the blame Colin put on his own parents. I don't think his angle of blaming them is professional at all. His message about becoming aware of racial biasing is a good one, but the way he's doing it, and has been doing it is terrible, in my opinion.

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