"Hey there, freaks and geeks of all ages. Tune on in, we got a helluva lineup tonight. And don't forget, tonight's "Devil's pickin's". That's right, tonight, at around 3 A.M., we open the floor for suggestions for next picks for the next hour."

I pressed the button to queue the demonic laugh -- the same tired out track that I'm surprised, out of all the calls we got, none of them were about getting a new one.

"But for now, lay back and relax in your infernal hot tubs as our first hellish pick for tonight is--"

The phone started ringing. I tried ignoring it.

"... "Hade's Triumph" by Severance, followed by--"

The phone continued to ring. It's to a point where it was drowning out the sound of my voice. I raise my eyebrow, looking at the time. It was only 11:30 P.M., not even time for the nightly Q&A segments and our "Lucky Devil giveway" was the night before. In short, there was no reason for some cock sucker to be calling right now.

I waited about another half a minute for the damn thing to quit ringing, but it wouldn't. Finally, I roll my eyes and pick up the phone. "Hello, my fiendish little Imp, we thank you for calling REPER.FM. Unfortunately, the floor is not open for--"

"Sing me a lullaby..." I paused. It sounded like a little girl on the phone.

"Well hello there, is your mother or father around?"

"Sing me a lullaby." I clear my throat.

"Little lady, I appreciate you wanting to call me and all, but this isn't the right time to--" I stopped and almost chucked the headphones out of the station window when I heard the shrill sound of wailing from the other end. Immediately, I smashed the "End call" button and began panting. I sat for almost a full minute, looking around the room before realizing the damn recording light was still on and picking up my headphones from up off the control panel.

"Heh, forgive me for that, boys and ghouls, don't we all just hate wrong numbers**?"**

I hit the "Terrified screaming" track.

"Yeah, I bet that IS pretty creepy, huh? All alone, dead of night, and suddenly the phone rings when you know it shouldn't from someone you don't know... But you know what's even creepier, Severence, with their hit song, "Hades' triumph"! Enjoy, you little devils you."

I hit "Play" on the song list and sat back. What the fuck was that? I thought as the opening riff of the song kicked in. In seconds, the room was filled with overly aggressive guitar riffs and heart stopping drumbeats, followed swiftly by the lead singer's almost trademark opening howl of rage, marking the beginning of the song. With that, my anxiety almost immediately melted away.

"Howls from below, death in tow, and cries from the deep, rousing you of sleep..."

Before I even knew it, I was headbanging the shit out of the music like I used to back in high school.

"When the wolves howl, the air so foul, and innocent wombs are plowed, you all know, to Hades you maggots bow!"

I even mouth along to the chorus: "Hades' Triumph!" I was roused from concentration, however, when I heard the phone start ringing again. This time, it was somehow so loud that it actually not only stood out from the music, overpowering as it was, but even managed to drown out most of the music. Like the first time, trying to ignore it did me no good because it just kept ringing and ringing. Even when the song ended and the next one, one that was significantly louder and heavier by the way, came on, the phone was still ringing.

Rolling my eyes, I answered. "Hello, my fiendish little Imp, we thank you for calling REPER.FM..."

This time, it was an older woman's voice, about mid-30s or so, softly saying, "Will you sing for me? You always used to sing for us. Remember that?" I paused.

"M-Ma'am, I'm not sure what you're--"

The little girl's voice returned. "Sing for us. Sing us a lullaby..." They both then started repeating the words, "Sing us a lullaby". I mashed the "End call" button again before returning to the soundboard to prep for the Q&A session. I closed my eyes and sighed.

Just get through the next half hour and then it's music again... I looked to the clock. It was 12:45. Fuckin' wonderful I thought. Only five more hours till the AM DJ comes and I can go home and smoke myself stupid till 10:00 that night. I eyed the mini fridge. No, better save the BANGs for later...

"Well, well, folks, it's that time again. That's right, for the next half hour, DJ 'Thulu is taking any and all questions, requests, and possible deals... For the price of your soul, of course..."

I played the demonic laugh track and sat back. Now, typically these go one of two ways. Either the phone immediately starts ringing off the hook (sometimes before I can even finish my opening speech for it), or I get no calls at all that night. Tonight was the first time, however, that neither was the case. Instead, it was almost two minutes, and therefore I wasn't expecting it, before the phone startled me by ringing out of seemingly nowhere. I quickly threw on my headphones and hit the "Answer" button.

"Welcome caller, our first of the night. What can REPER.FM do for you toni--"

That sound from before, the sounds of wailing, blasted through my headphones, damn near giving me a heart arrythmia. "Why do you hate us!" the voices from before cried. My body still frozen, I heard the crying sounds build in tempo. Then, I could hear the woman's voice shriek followed by the little girl crying.

"M-Ma'am, calm down, are you--"

"I said shut up, bitch!" bellowed an almost inhumanly deep, growling voice that then began laughing.

"Ma'am, hello, are you there? Is everything okay?"

There was no reply. The wailing sounds also ceased abruptly. I was left all alone, quiet and dark in the studio room. My breathing was unsteady, caught between hyperventilation and heavy breathing. Prone, alert, waiting for the next surprise.

Nothing happened.

I looked at the time; 1:15 A.M. Only another 10 minutes before the music got to come back. At least then I'd have some kind of noise in the background.

About 1:20 rolled around and I was about to announce that Q&A was over and that "The siren's cry" by Taurus was up next when the phone rang again. Now, I almost didn't pick it up. Honestly, if I wasn't still trying to build up enough repertoire as a nighttime radio host for my portfolio -- I aspired to be a voice actor -- and therefore needed to keep this job at the station, I'd have been more than happy to let the bitch ring itself right on; crank caller, distress, or legitimate caller be damned. Of course, aside from what I just mentioned, that damn phone was just too goddamn annoying to listen to.

I picked up the phone, bracing for... well, I can't really say what I was bracing for, but something.

"H-ello?"

-- "Hello?! Can you hear me?!"

The voice sounded panicked like the other two, but it wasn't either the woman or the little girl's voices this time. No, this time, it was a man's voice.

-- "Hello, please, someone, ANYONE! Please help us! It hurts, It hurts so..."

I began to hear a cloud of static devour his voice.

"Sir, what's going on? Sir? Sir, are you okay?!"

His voice struggled in and out of static the way a drowning man fights for air.

-- "I... It hurts... He hates us... Please... Help..."

I was about to try and call out to him again when that deep bellow from before came back as a low, rumbling sort of demonic laughter that grew slowly into a beastial roar. "You get what you deserve, now shut up and--"

I couldn't listen anymore because, right at that moment, all at once, each and every one of the screams came back. The last thing I could hear was, in a mix of both the demon's and the little girl's voice, was "Will you sing me a lullaby, please?" I sat there, staring bug-eyed and breathless at my discarded headphones. I reached out, shaking, to pick them up again when I noticed that they were glowing.

I hesitated for a second before continuing to pick them up. They weren't hot at all, in fact, quite the opposite. They were so cold that my arm broke into goosebumps the instant I touched them. When I put them on again, the only thing I could hear was static, low and almost completely indistinct, sounding more like those rainfall ambiences you'd sometimes listen to to fall asleep.

Well, that is until, a couple seconds later, when I realized they were getting closer, growing in intensity and pitch until I realized it wasn't static at all, but the screaming again. I started turning a few of the knobs to try switching the stations. Funny enough, those were red hot, blistering the shit out of my fingertips as soon as I touched them.

Each and every fuckin' one of them were like this too, leaving only the broadcast and playback buttons being able to be touched. I pressed the broadcasting button and began asking if anyone was there and/or if they were okay and could hear me. Obviously, I got no answer other than the ever-growing noise. I noticed, too, that the room started to get extremely hot.

Scorching, in fact, to a point where I started feeling dizzy. Not only that, but even the chair I was sitting in started getting toasty on the backside, so I made to stand up, only to find that my pants had already somehow fused to the cushion of the seat. I was stuck, there was nothing I could do to escape or make any of this stop. I looked over to the window, intent on shouting, praying to God that I'd get lucky enough to catch some street bum's attention to come and get me the hell out of there, when I realized I couldn't even see the fuckin' street anymore. All that was there now was a blank void.

What the hell?! Where's the street? Where am I? How long has it been gone -- HOW could it be gone?!

My head spun in literally every possible direction. I mashed the broadcast button again.

"Hello? Someone, ANYONE? Can anybody hear me? Hello?!"

-- "Hello Andrew..."

My eyes were two seconds from exploding in their sockets. I heard the deep, rumbling, roaring laughter blast me from both sides of my headphones, causing my heart to jump.

-- "I'm sorry, ahem, I meant to say, hello "DJ 'Thulhu". Is that better?"

"Wh-Who--"

-- "Just your lucky caller for tonight. Aw Hell, I've been one of this station's biggest, and oldest, fans. I always love hearing your stuff, listening to the music and all. So do the filthy maggots and harlots here with me, as you've no doubt noticed."

"Huh? Dude, what the hell do you want from me?"

I hear the laugh again.

-- "Well now, that's an EXCELLENT question. Though I thought I was supposed to ask YOU the questions here, as the fan and all. Oh fuck it, I'll humor you, though the answer isn't about what I want from you, but instead what Hell actually wants from you."

I started throwing my head furiously around the room. I even peered around to the window again. Everywhere I looked, no one was there.

"Where the hell even ARE YOU?!"

-- "I'm everywhere. I'm inside each and every man, woman, and brat that was vomited up to this shithole Earth since its conception."

"Huh? Dude, that doesn't even make any sense, what the fuck are you--"

-- "Whoa, whoa, slow down, motor mouth. As much as I love hearing your voice every night, I'm afraid you're starting to exhaust your good graces with me with all these interrogations of yours here. I mean, for fuck's sake, you haven't even given me a chance to answer your last question. You don't normally ask this many questions to people, do you?"

"No, but then again, this shit doesn't usually happen either."

The voice laughs again.

-- "Eh, fair enough, I suppose, though I think from here on, I'd like to do most of the talking if that's all right with you, Mr. "'Thulhu", sir."

"O-Okay, whatever, just tell me what you want here."

-- "Ahh, that's better, though again, it's not just about me tonight, but about what all of Hell wants. Now, as I understand it, tonight is "Devil's pickin's" night, yes?"

"Uh... Y-Yeah, what about it?"

-- "Well, as your longest fans, I think it's high time we cash in on that opportunity, yeah?"

"B-But I... I can't do that yet."

-- "What do you mean, you "Can't"? I thought that's how this was supposed to work, we pick the songs and YOU play them..."

The room was unbearably hot now. Sweltering. My breathing was heavy and my head felt light. The room began to spin and I thought I was going to collapse onto the panel in front of me.

-- "What's wrong, "DJ 'Thulhu"? Cat got your tongue? The heat of the situation setting in, maybe?"

I mashed the button again.

"What the fuck're you doing to me?"

-- "So much for letting ME do the talking, huh? Whatever, so here's the deal, pal..."

I heard the laugh again, this time smaller, more of a chuckle than a bellowing cackle.

-- "Myself, and the others with me I mentioned before are going to make a few song requests, and you're going to play them, got it? You know, just like every other "Devil's pickin's" night..."

I started panting. My vision went cloudy, I could barely even distinguish the knobs from the panel in front of me.

"F-F-Fine, okay, you win, but will you let me go if I do?"

-- "Well, I am known for my deals, and a deal ain't worth a maggot's rancid turd if I don't hold up my end of them. I will let you go tonight if you play our lineup for tonight's "pickin's". sound fair?"

"Y-Y-Yeessss."

Darkness was closing in. My body felt like it would've burst into flames at any second, just out of thin air. Suddenly, though, fresh air started to fill my flaccid lungs again. I coughed and sputtered.

-- "Now, you ready for the first pick?"

"Yeah, sure, whatever."

-- "Good, now for this first one, Imma let one of the underlings shoot their shots first."

I heard the screams return, with the man's voice returning, sobbing.

-- "I... I wanna hear you play..."

"What? I... I can't hear you."

I heard the man cry out in pain, with the deep voice roaring at him to "Speak up and quit crying like a little maggot".

-- "Pl-Play... Play "Hero" by Skillet..."

I was confused for a second. I could hear the groans of agony also pick up in pitch. Then I heard an ear-splitting screech followed by a sickening squelching sound, followed finally by a gurgling death rattle.

"Wha- What the fuck was that?"

-- "Look, disregard what he just said, you hear? That pious moron has ALWAYS been a pain in my tail -- BOTH of them. When you try and do something nice for some people, eh?"

"Wha... Huh?"

-- "Ah, anyway, So, I think I'll let her go first then?"

"Wait, who are you--"

The little girl came back.

-- "Will you sing us a lullaby now?"

"Huh? What are you talking about?"

The demon voice was heard laughing.

-- "Aw, she is just SO precious, ain't she? Well, you heard her, play her a lullaby."

"B-but how? I mean, I don't have any--"

-- "Didn't your mother ever sing to you when you were her age?"

"Um... Y-Yeah, I... I guess so, but--"

-- "Well how fuckin' lucky for you. See, SHE never got to hear a lullaby, you wanna know why?"

I was about to try and reply that I really didn't. Sadly, he wasn't actually asking.

-- "She never got to hear a lullaby because her mommy kept trying to kill her every night. Yeah, real piece of work SHE was, huh? Oh, but don't worry, she's here too."

The voice laughed and the little girl returned.

-- "Please sing me a lullaby, Mr. DJ 'Thulhu?"

I paused for a moment, unsure completely as to what the hell I was supposed to do. I don't know exactly how long I sat idle for, but it was apparently too long for whoever it was on the phone because the next thing I knew, the air in the room started getting thick and heavy again. This time, I could even see my skin turning a bright pinkish sort of red, like a sunburn.

-- "Getting hot in there, ain't it?"

The voice laughed again. The little girl, I heard, started to break into tears.

-- "Why won't you sing me a lullaby?"

My throat felt tight, slowly choking me out. I reached out to push the answer button, which in itself felt like more of a struggle than it ever should've.

-- "Why do you hate me?!"

The screams all returned. My skin was about to start blistering and my vision was darkening again. Finally, I managed to hit the button and start (Sort of) singing.

"Rock-a-by-baby in the treetop. When the wind blows, the cradle will rock. When the bough breaks, the cradle will fall... And down comes baby, cradle and all..."

The air pressure returned to normal and I could breathe again. For a moment after, nothing happened. The other side was dead silent. Is that it, are they finally gone?

-- "Well, well, ain't that just awful touching?"

"Alright, look, I sang your damn lullaby. Just pick the next song already."

The voice let out a roaring laugh.

-- "Geez, kid, I'm just trying to have a bit of fun here. Not like there's anybody else on the line waiting, ya know."

The woman's voice was next.

-- "Play "The world falls apart" by Devious Jackers."

"Um... O-Okay..."

I started flipping through my records and CD's in the filing cabinet next to the panel.

"I... I don't have it."

-- "Check your playlist again."

"What? My playlist?"

-- "On your phone, go on, check it."

I did. Opening up my playlist, right at the top was the song. My eyes widened.

"Wait, what the hell? I didn't buy--"

-- "Oh, nevermind that now, just play it. And don't worry, it won't rack up any "Suspicious charges" on your bank account. Just play it and it'll be gone by sunrise."

Sunrise I thought. I looked at the time. It was now 4:00. Only another hour and a half till the sun starts coming up. Of course, I wasn't exactly sure how it all worked here, but my belief was that, who or whatever these jack-offs were, they'd be gone by sunrise and this would all be over.

Just another hour...

I pressed the button to play the song. The song itself was almost 10 minutes long, with strung-out guitar solos and long periods of time where the vocalist just howled gutturally into the microphone. Usually, you know, I'm all into that shit, but this time... I couldn't tell why, but I was actually unsettled. The tune itself felt like it was travelling inside of my body, battering all of my organs around, and then forcefully pulling out my spirit or something like that, I don't know -- I'm not religious.

Finally, the song ended.

-- "Bravo, DJ 'Thulhu. You really are the best host here, aren't ya?"

"Whatever, just hurry up and pick the next song."

-- "You really ought to learn to relax, but as you wish. Now, I think I'm feeling generous enough to let this fucker have another turn. What do you say, ready to choose a song again?"

The man's voice returned again, though this time it was mutated, sounding like a mix of his original voice and that of the demon voice.

-- "Yes, master, I want to hear "From below" by Leviathan."

Like last time, I started flipping through the CDs as well as checking my playlist on my phone. Right as I was about to tell them I didn't have it, though, there it was, appearing spontaneously at the top above "The world falls apart". Sighing, I hit play.

This song was even more rending than the last. This song not only carried on for 3 times as long, but also didn't even feel like an actual fucking song, but rather a weird ass sort of ambience. Imagine thise ambiences you'd hear of like an underwater setting or something, right, only instead of sounding like an aquarium or anything like that, all you hear is some gigantic thing growling like it's trying to say something (don't even bother asking me what) for 30 minutes straight. That's exactly what this "song" was.

Weirder still, This one actually started having me seeing things. I imagined the world, drowned in a red river, blood I assumed, with everyone in it crying out for mercy like the voices on the other end of the radio were earlier. Then, from the river, I watched this tyrannical creature with four stupidly muscular arms, Jagged, almost metallic looking teeth, Marbled, pitch-black eyes, and a giant maw that looked like it'd swallow the planet whole.

I had no idea what it was trying to say, but I could see its mouth move in accordance to the garbled "lyrics" from the music. Not only that, but the monster seemed to be looking straight at me as it spoke. The screams then started to emit from the body of the beast, with the people having actually fused with the damn thing to form this chimerical abomination straight out of a goddamn horror movie. That was when they all screamed out to me, "We are, all of us, together..." The monster's body began to change, it's slippery, scaly flesh dissolving away into that of a giant shadow that loomed over the world. "The End!"

I remember screaming at this. Funny thing was, I wasn't even trying to scream. Yeah, I was scared, yeah, my mind was beyond fucked to the point of no real return, but despite this, I wasn't making a conscious effort to scream, even if just out of a reflex, you know? I guess I should say that I was somehow actually forced to scream. In any case, though, I came out of it some time later and found that the song was over. I looked at the time.

4:45 A.M.

Only another 15 minutes...

I honestly wondered if I'd even last that long.

-- "Well, well, certainly a banger that one was, huh?"

I didn't respond for a good two to three minutes, still not convinced everything was back to normal again -- well, at least in the semi-general sense.

-- "Hello? You still with us here, DJ 'Thulhu?"

I hit the button.

"Y-Yeah. Yeah, I'm here, look, "Devil's pickin's" is almost over okay? If you've got anymore tracks to play, then let's get 'em over with."

-- "Well Christ on a stick, you ain't kidding. It really is almost up, ain't it? Well then, Its a good thing I saved the best for last."

The screams, the roaring laughter, and the sounds from the last track, all combined into one as I heard the voice say for me to play something called "The Deal" by The Fallen. My heart froze for a second as I shakily opened the playlist to find, like the other two, that it, too, poofed its way to the top of the list. Fearing a lot more what would happen if I hesitated, I panic-mashed the play button.

Immediately, the speakers emitted the absolute single most high-pitched screech that was even earthly possible. It even caused sparks to fly from both the speakers and the panel. In seconds, the studio was filled with sparks flying like fireworks. I reached to hit the stop button when the phone itself exploded into flames.

From there, the room then caught flame, engufing the entire room in the span of only a minute. I frantically jumped up from my seat, now being free to move again, and tried jerking the door open. It was stuck, and so then I tried breaking the window. Somehow, though, even hurling the chair at it with all my strength was absolutely worthless. Over the chaos, through the headphones, I could hear the abominable voice laughing.

-- "How's this for a hot single, huh?"

"What are you doing?! Let me out! LET ME OUT!" The voice laughed again.

-- "Well now, the song ain't over yet, now is it?"

"You can't do this, you have to let me go!"

-- "Not till the song's over. That was our deal, remember? You play my little selection, and I'll let you go. Don't worry, this IS the last one, I promise. Now, I'm gonna enjoy the rest of this song and you... well, you can go back to trying to beat the heat..."

I heard the laughing one last time before I heard the line on their end disconnect. I looked around the room. Everything, everywhere was swallowed in flames. I was trapped. There was nowhere I could go, nothing I could do. The flames crept teasingly slowly ever closer toward me. Smoke now infested the air, suffocating me further. In seconds, I was gagging and wheezing. My vision clouded over, my arms and legs lost strength, and darkness spread across the room and then...

And then nothing...

I couldn't see, feel, smell, or hear anything. It stayed like this for God only knew how long and I'd have thought for sure that I was dead if it weren't for the fact that I was shaken awake by a firefighter. My vision was blurry and my head felt like a sack of bricks had been taken upside it at full force. "Wha- Where..."

"Easy there, son." said the fireman. "Just breathe." I tried to and it resulted in a whooping cough. He then gently fitted an oxygen mask to my face. "Here, now try."

It was still a bit before I was able to, but I was able to start eventually breathing properly again. When the police arrived, along with my boss, the producer of the station, I was almost instantly barraged with questions along the lines of "What in the unholy hell happened in the studio?" I'd have laughed at that, if only out of sheer morbid irony, but of course the condition of my lungs wouldn't have allowed for that. And obviously no, I didn't try explaining what any of that was that happened. Instead, I just told them that the equipment caught fire and the door and window somehow got stuck.

Being honest, if it weren't for the email I got just a few hours later when I got home, I'd have probably believed that. As it was, I found out that my survival is thanks to a random tip from a "Deep voiced fellow" as one cheeky nurse out it, that they'd seen the studio building on fire. I was rushed then to the hospital, where it was found, albeit rather quickly, that I was relatively unharmed, outside of a bit of smoke inhalation, and was sent home.

It was there, though, that I got an email on my computer from an email that, as far as I was aware, couldn't be real, that read as the following:

"Glad to know you got outta there, DJ 'Thulhu ;) Can't have my favorite host getting all crispy on me just yet. After all, next "Devil's pickin's" night is next Friday, right? Well, gotta keep the maggots entertained till then. See you soon, Andy!

Sincerely,

Your lucky devil ;)

(P.S. Don't worry about the studio, I'll personally see to it that it's up and running again...)"