Reina0520 t1_ixf35fh wrote
First, thank you for sharing.
Secondly, thank you for acting obediently. I believe that Jesus Himself would have baptized the evil one if it meant that He could save His once favored angel from rebellion. You didn't do anything wrong. If you believe that God is omnipotent then you believe that nothing or anyone is more powerful than God. The evil one is a created being just as we were created by God for His Glory. He is only as powerful as the power that is given to him by humanity. Applying this logic then means that when God commands even the evil one obeys. Perhaps, he was being facetious during the baptism because he was annoyed that he had to heed God’s command to be restored. It's like the bully who attempts to make the person being bullied feel bad. They do so because they in fact feel badly about themselves. He was powerless to stop God and was annoyed with you for carrying out your purpose. Like someone else wrote, “why is it that everyone prays for sinners except for the greatest sinner of all?”
Finally, perhaps instead of praying you should focus on the answer to your prayer. If you quiet your mind and soul long enough to listen you may hear those answers.
Be still and know that He is God. With love and light 💛
RooMorgue OP t1_ixf5eeg wrote
Thank you for such a considerate reply!
I've been extremely touched by all the encouragement, and after getting some much needed rest I'm more inclined to agree. Clearly the Devil—and I still believe that is who he was—intended to test my faith and instill fear into my heart. I haven't been without doubt over the years (find me any believer who hasn't) but this has been my life's harshest ordeal.
Understandably so, I suppose, but it is never pleasant to feel one's theology so shaken.
Until there is any true evidence that Satan achieved his implied goal of disturbing God's peace I must assume that he was allowed the baptism for a reason. I must await answers, and trust that all isn't lost as I was so certain it must be in my time of weakness. I must believe that this emptiness I feel is only guilt and fear, which likely the Devil intended, with his tricks and torment.
Since writing my account I've been much reassured by everyone's words, and intend to continue my duties, for all my doubts. If my tormentor returns I hope to rally myself, to challenge the implications of which I've been so afraid.
I'll return with further reports as the weeks go on. As collected as I may sound now I cannot promise I won't be swayed again by what I see or hear.
Reina0520 t1_ixf6f44 wrote
You, one million percent got this! Besides, in reading the responses you've got an impressive group of us lifting you up. It's never easy but always worth it. Ephesians 6:10-18 😉
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