I haven't slept in days. My job is blowing up my phone because I haven't showed up to work since last week. I just can't bring myself to leave the house.

All I can think about is where it all went wrong.

It all started as a weekend trip down to Los Angeles. My best friend, Alina, moved there a couple months back and I finally got some time off to see her. I drove down from San Francisco because I enjoy long drives while listening to podcasts and needed some destressing. I won't lie, I was really nervous. Alina is VERY different than I am, she is drop dead gorgeous, almost 6 feet tall and very outgoing. I am barely 5'5, average looking and socially awkward. I think our friendships works because we balance each other out to some degree.

My weariness started once I got over the grapevine on I-5. It felt like I had just entered a bubble of illusion. I had been to LA a few times before but this was the first time I felt this way. It was like this city was the most beautiful thing I had ever witnessed. I felt star struck for a moment. As I drove deeper into the city, that feeling was still there but also I noticed how grey everything looked. The trees, flowers, buildings, etc, all looked like they had lost their vibrancy. I should have realized what lied ahead after that.

The weekend started off very typical. I got to her apartment ( a lot nicer than I ever anticipated ) and unloaded my suitcase. We grabbed our $10 coffee and were catching up. We did some light shopping, grabbed lunch, and just enjoyed each others company after being separated for months. Alina was a lot less bubbly than before and seemed to mostly talk about how much money she has been making but I did not think much of it. She definitely was a little more "boujee" than she had been before too but hey its LA, right?

Alina's friends are typical LA socialites. All injected with who knows what, spray tanned to different races and all get their money from sugar daddies. Once again, I could not be more different. But I digress.

The day I met all her friend for the first time we were at a brunch restaurant for bottomless mimosas. They all arrived 30 minutes late but I wouldn't expect anything else. It was a bit awkward at first, well, I was a bit awkward at first. But something about them was so intoxicating. They reeled me in and we became best friends within the hour. I was pleasantly surprised, her friends seemed to like me and I was no longer anxious/nervous. The mimosas helped, but I am in no way a heavy drinker so I just had a light buzz.

After brunch was nearly over, one of Alina's closer friends, Willow, invited everyone back to her apartment for some drinks and to swim/ hot tub. Honestly, I was a little hesitant because all these girls look like damn super models and I am a little chubby. But, there was something drawing me to these girls.

We go back to Willow's place and it was the nicest apartment I have ever seen. It was on the top floor of a very well known building and had almost 360 views of the city. I noticed that the whole apartment was grey and had no color. Just grey. Weird.

There was also other people here that were not at brunch. Mostly men and a few girls. None of them seemed very friendly or wanting to talk. One of them seemed like he was exceptionally stoned, eyes glazed over and just sitting on the couch while staring off into space. I avoided most of them and made small talk with one other girl while Alina was changing. Her name was Nina and had just met Willow that day but decided to come anyway.

We head down to the pool area and it was like the moment we stepped in everyone wanted to f*ck each other. I was so uncomfortable and honestly just wanted to climb into a hole. Alina was nowhere to be found. Nina was making out with Willow. I just wanted to go back to the apartment. After about 20 minutes of straight up soft core porn, someone calls my name. I look around and I see Willow waving her hand at me. She asked me if I was having fun and very unconvincingly I said "yeahhh." She then puts her hand on my chest and it felt like I couldn't move. For a just a moment I saw something I could not explain. Her eyes were pitch black and soulless. I audibly gasped and took a step back. I didn't believe what I was seeing and tried to play it off like I was drunk and just lost my footing. She walked away without saying a thing. I sat in the hot tub and started to look around to what everyone was doing. All the girls/guys that were with Alina's friends almost seemed like they were in a trance. None of them were talking, just standing there, looking into the eyes of the girls they were paired up with. I sat there for a moment digesting what was happening.

I noticed all of her friends eyes were black. I started to hyperventilate but wanted to keep quiet and not draw any attention to myself. I started to look for Alina, we needed to get the hell out of that building and book it back to her apartment.

She was not in the pool or hot tub. I was panicking, thinking the worst. I don't know what urged me to go into the changing rooms, but I did. I really wish I didn't.

I slowly opened the curtain and there was Alina. Crouched in the corner of the dark dressing room. All I could see was her neon pink swimsuit and long black hair. She was making these noises, it sounded like someone squishing Jell-o between their hands.

I called out to her but was hesitant to walk further into the room. She was not turning around or responding to me in anyway. I took a deep breath and called her name again while slowly approaching her. The smell then hit me like a truck. Sulphur.

Alina turned around once I was within arms reach. Her face was full of throbbing veins and her eyes were pitch black. She was eating something like that looked like a someone. Face and hair covered in blood. I was paralyzed with fear. After grabbing my arm she let out the most deafening, high pitch screech. I tried to run but she was inhumanly strong and her nails were digging into my arm. When our eyes met, I could see my Alina for a brief moment and she looked terrified. It was like she recognized me and was screaming for help from the inside.

I managed to get my arm loose in that split second and run. I ran past all her friends, through the lobby and into the street. I ran and ran until I couldn't see the building anymore. I called an uber and sat through the drive to her apartment staring at the scratch on my arm and silently weeping. I couldn't even comprehend what I just experienced.

I didn't even call Alina when I got back to her building. I gathered all my things and left. Thank god I drove myself because I would not have been able to wait for a flight. I sat in silence the whole 6 hour drive home. Debated calling the cops but I would have just sounded insane to them.

Its been a week and Alina has called me easily over 100 times.

Every time I close my eyes I see her. I see the throbbing veins and black eyes. I see the blood dripping off her long acrylic nails.

How am I to go back to normal life? What did her friends do to her? What the hell were they doing to all those people? Is this how they have so much money?

My mind cannot rest. I have so many questions but I don't think I want the answers. I just want my life to go back to normal but how can I?

Even after all of this I still can feel my mind and body wanting to go back to Los Angeles. I want to go back and help her but I don't think its possible. She isn't human. She isn't my Alina anymore.

But if I do go back, maybe she can tell me why the scratch on my arm is turning grey and why I can't bring myself to eat anything? Why I am able to go every night without a wink of sleep but still not be tired?

Maybe I should go back?