This has been going on for as long as I can remember. Every night, after my parents are asleep, I hear it. A dark, twisted version of my own voice, taunting me. My parents say they can't hear it. Over the years, I have cried, begged and pleaded with them to believe me. On the nights I'm not completely frozen with fear, I go to their bedroom and beg them to come to my room and listen. The times they relent and come with me, the taunts turn to weeping. They still insist they can't hear anything.

​

I have torn my room apart, looking for any evidence that something is or has been in there, but I find nothing. On nights where I've been particularly disturbed, my parents have made a show of checking my wardrobes and drawers for me, and nothing.

​

I have been in therapy since I first started complaining of all of this, every therapist I've had has told my parents I either have an overactive imagination, or that I am suffering from night terrors. Whichever they put it down to, they tell us that I will eventually outgrow it. I turned 16 yesterday and I can see my parents are growing increasingly concerned. I know I won't outgrow this, what is happening is real, but no one will listen.

​

The reason I'm posting about it now is, its presence is growing stronger. My earliest memories of it, the voice was very low and weak, it sounded muffled almost like it was behind a closed door. Each time I'd start feeling comfortable enough to ignore it, the voice grew slightly louder and clearer. It tells me that I don't deserve what I have, that I owe them my life and that it is unfair I get to live.

​

Six months ago was the first time I heard it scream, loud enough that it sounded like it was right in my face. The fear I felt at that moment was almost physical, like my body sank below the earth and my brain was trying to climb its way back out to safety. It screamed at me that it was their turn. That was the last I heard of it that night, but it has only exacerbated since then.

​

A week ago was the first time I saw it, I thought I was hallucinating at first due to the lack of sleep. I was getting ready for bed when I thought I saw something behind me in the mirror, I turned but nothing was there. I got into bed, switched my lamp off and was scrolling on my phone when I thought I could see a shadow above me. I put my torch on and looking down at me was my own face, but it was... not quite right. I tried to scream but it got caught in my throat. The face looking back at me flashed a twisted smile and said “wow, you can actually see me now.” I scrambled out of the bed and sprinted to my parents' room, screaming through tears that there was someone in my room.

​

My parents came to my room to check and said they couldn't see or hear anything, but it was still there. I was hysterical, pointing and screaming at it. They were telling me there was nothing there and trying to calm me down. This fake replica of myself was now standing in the corner, completely ignoring me and looking at my parents longingly and crying. I felt like my head was going to implode from both fear and frustration, how could they not see it?! It was right there in front of us!

​

I slept on the floor of my parents room that night. The next morning at breakfast, my parents said they were worried as that was the worst they had seen me. I tried to plead with them again to believe me but, they insisted they couldn't see it. They said that my current therapist obviously isn't working as this is getting worse, not better. I stormed out and went to school early.

​

Over the last week, my parents have been obsessively googling and calling clinics to try and find a specialist that can help me with my “condition”. They've made me stay in my room each night as they're concerned about “feeding the delusion”. It has been a nightmare. I've been able to see it every night, it gets in my face and endlessly berates me.

“You don't deserve this life!”

“Give it to me!”

“IT'S MY TURN!”

All I could do, was close my eyes and cry.

​

Last night however, was different. It was my birthday and I spent the day as I usually do. Pancakes for breakfast, went to watch a movie and in the evening my Grandparents came around for birthday cake. Once it had gotten late, I went up to my room and went through my usual night time routine. I switched the lights off and got into bed, scrolling on my phone like I always do. Not long after it began again, like clockwork. It started with singing, “happy birthday to US, happy birthday to US”, its voice dripping with hate. I switched the lamp on and there it was, standing there sneering at me. For the first time in my life I spoke to it.

​

I asked it what it wanted and it basically spat its words at me. It told me that it's been telling me what it wants all along. It told me that its been with me since the beginning and just because I tried to get rid of them, doesn't mean they ever went away, they will always be a part of me. I asked it what it was talking about. It said I was selfish, there was enough love for both of us, but I had to take it all for myself. I told it I'm just a kid and I've never hurt anyone. It scoffed at me and said I hurt them before I even took my first breath. I told it I had no idea what it's talking about and it rushed towards me and screamed in my face. It screamed that it's not fair, I got to live and they're stuck looking in at the life that they should have had. It said I don't deserve it, it's about time I surrendered control. I asked it what it meant and it said sisters are supposed to share.

​

My Mom knocked on my bedroom door telling me to turn off the light and go to sleep, when I turned back it was gone.

​

Sisters?! I'm an only child and this thing clearly isn't even human. What the hell is it talking about? Telling me I need to surrender control, control of what?! I have no idea what any of this means and I am so exhausted. I am running out of energy to even deal with all of this. I am so scared but I almost want it to show tonight as I have so many questions.