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BlkSunshineRdriguez t1_j8rohye wrote

Reply to comment by leni710 in Little evidence to support health claims made on formula milk by Dodomando

When I had my babies about 20 years ago we were under pressure to bottlefeed formula and discouraged from breastfeeding. Are people now under pressure to breastfeed?

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thetruetrueu t1_j8rotzz wrote

Extremely so. My wife just went through this process and its like a cult.

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Spoonloops t1_j8s8aik wrote

It feels like this is the current "mom scene" in a nut shell. After my first I left all the "support" groups for moms because its such a toxic competition over everything. Doesnt matter what they do, moms (and Dads!) get picked apart and shamed. Obviously there's some actual dangerous practices that deserve it, but the bulk of it is just ridiculous.

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thetruetrueu t1_j8safn9 wrote

It was appalling and watching my wife feel so much anguish over it was just jaw dropping. She actually was developing terrible mastitis and did not realize it until it was emergency room time because she was trying to ‘push through’.

I was just so oblivious to how much competition and stress are in those circles.

Its a privilege to have a smooth birth and breastfeeding experience. We did not have either and were made to feel like we did something wrong.

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Spoonloops t1_j8sd6wu wrote

People forget not that long ago something like 2 out 5 kids didn't make it to their 3rd birthday. Infant and toddler deaths where very high. We have alot of tools now to prevent this. My youngest was born with a rare defect that used to have a 98% mortality rate, now its unheard of for a baby to die from it because of a simple surgery and some intervention at birth. Now he gets to live a perfectly normal (whatever that is) life like it never happened. I just can't get my head around these super privileged moms who got lucky trying to pretend modern medical and feeding advancements are evil and being cruel to other moms about it.

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Poka_poke t1_j8sbfak wrote

Was in the hospital with my 3 week old baby (still wasn't discharged yet due to some health issue which got resolved) and we ran out of my defrosted breastmilk during a feed. The nurse said we can just stop this feeding session because the only other immediately available option was formula, which was apparently worse than to just leave the baby hungry? I requested to use the formula if it was available and the nurse rushed off and came back with breastmilk which she quickly defrosted.

My point is that yes, there is stigma against formula, at least in the hospitals I was in.

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leni710 t1_j8rs16z wrote

Interestingly, it was the opposite for me...but with some added layers: my mom said when she had me, the pressure was to bottle feed from her elders who were the first generation to really be encouraged to do so. Then she balked that sentiment from them and breast fed. Then she pressured me to breast feed, also around 20 years ago when I had my first, and it was so complicated that when it was too difficult, I thought I was the failure. I'm of the opinion that people need to do what works in order to feed babies.

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bad-fengshui t1_j8s8gz0 wrote

There is an insane pressure to breastfeed.

Our pediatrician let it slip that even though she her stance is "fed is best", she avoids giving real medical diagnoses because they often result in mother giving up breastfeeding.

In our case our baby was screaming 24/7, had constant reflux to the point that anytime you put him down he would just gurggle on his own vomit, and had constant painful gas. We suspected a food allergy, but she just basically pretend like it wasn't possible.

It was only after we proved to her that it was a food allergy, that she mentioned why she pretended like it didn't exist.

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JennJayBee t1_j8sd1nb wrote

Mine was 16 years ago. I had some pressure to breast feed, but thankfully it wasn't as much as some. I've heard some horror stories of women being pressured pretty hard. I remember sitting in the hospital bed in tears in the middle of the night with my newborn daughter screaming in my arms because she was hungry and not getting fed. One of the nurses was an absolute angel and brought me some formula, which did the trick until my milk came in properly.

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