new_Australis OP t1_j80cug6 wrote on February 10, 2023 at 6:17 PM

Reply to comment by HaElfParagon in Pre-School teacher at a public school keeps disciplining out son for saying "oh my god" by new_Australis

>Have you tried asking the teacher (respectfully) to try removing the stick from their ass?

I have not, I am debating whether to do this or not. Since we fear the teacher will hold it against our son.

>It's perfectly acceptable to say oh my god in a public school.

I agree

>Your teacher giving your kid shit for it is what we call, forcing their religion on your child, and is not acceptable.

I agree, this is how I feel. She is forcing her beliefs onto him. Something we don't do as our atheist beliefs are our own and if he chooses religion in the future that will be his option.

HaElfParagon t1_j80dem2 wrote on February 10, 2023 at 6:21 PM

I saw someone said to tell the principal. I believe going over the teachers head from the get-go would exascerbate things, and worsen your kids relationship with their teacher. I'd request a meeting with the teacher to discuss things, and see if they can't be reasonable.

new_Australis OP t1_j80edi3 wrote on February 10, 2023 at 6:27 PM

>I believe going over the teachers head from the get-go would exascerbate things, and worsen your kids relationship with their teacher.

This is true

>I'd request a meeting with the teacher to discuss things, and see if they can't be reasonable.

If it happens one more time I will choose this option. Thank you for your advice.

JaKr8 t1_j80dxat wrote on February 10, 2023 at 6:24 PM

I don't know that she is forcing her beliefs on him, as opposed to just maybe not wanting to have certain type of outbursts in the class. It's very easy to have things get out of hand very quickly when you've got 20 some kids in a room, many of which already do not want to be there, even at 5 years old. I see no reason why you couldn't have a civil discussion about this with the teacher, but keep in mind sometimes you have to set more specific boundaries when you've got 20 five year olds running around your room versus one or three kids at home..

A long long long time ago, when one of my kids was in kindergarten, I was walking home after pickup with another parent whose child was in the same kindergarten class as mine was. The child was telling us he got in trouble for using the 'S' word with another child in the class.

"Stupid"

First of all, we were expectingit to be a different word.. And secondly, I understand although that's not a bad word per se, that its may be not a word the teacher wants used in her classroom. Anyway, we as parents had a chuckle about it, and the parent told their kid not to say that word at school. Never became an issue again.

new_Australis OP t1_j80fjg1 wrote on February 10, 2023 at 6:35 PM

Thank you for your words. We will work with him on not saying that phrase as it may hurt other kids feelings and the teacher's feelings as well. Maybe he will be more sympathetic to this reasoning. He often says oh my gosh as a replacement since his teacher told him to say that instead. So it's not so much the phrase oh my god more so the word god that is the issue with the teacher. As she has told him to say oh my goodness or oh my gosh as a substitute.

We will try to tell him to say oh man, or oh wow as a substitute.

I can say it's my fault as I often say oh my god, well.. "OH MY GA" is the actual phrase I use at home mainly when talking to my mother as it's her favorite phrase. So my guess is that our son hears me and as kid do they mimic their parents.

I will work on not using this phrase around him.

JaKr8 t1_j80t3g9 wrote on February 10, 2023 at 8:03 PM

It's a hard balance. And I'm not trying to be critical of your beliefs, because we are an agnostic family as well. But I do, having gotten certified to teach math and physics, understand what it's like to keep control of a rowdy classroom at times!!

Unfortunately I don't know if there's really any right or wrong here, since we all have different perspective on things. Either way I hope everything works out well for you and your son.

One of the drawbacks of Western Massachusetts is that there aren't a lot of school options, it's not like you could just take your kid out ( Not that you would ever want to do that) and put him in another local elementary school, especially if you are here in Berkshire county where everything is so far apart... So as a parent you definitely feel like you have to be carefully/diplomatically straddling that line between diplomacy, and standing up for your child.

new_Australis OP t1_j81mbjz wrote on February 10, 2023 at 11:21 PM

>One of the drawbacks of Western Massachusetts is that there aren't a lot of school options, it's not like you could just take your kid out ( Not that you would ever want to do that) and put him in another local elementary school,

This is true. They are now limiting the schools you can opt your kid into. He only has two options and those are the closest to his home.