Comments

You must log in or register to comment.

farts_n_darts t1_jca1kpe wrote

Roosters are either sweet lovebugs or hell in feathers. There is no in between.

680

ExternalIllusion t1_jcacltl wrote

Haha. Really? Never have interacted with one. People say cows can be assholes too but I’ve only met sweet ones. And I’ve read enough about geese on here that I have no interest lol.

155

xX420GanjaWarlordXx t1_jcahh6k wrote

I've hand raised chickens with one rooster. The hens would follow just like the video. The rooster would try to murder us. We would have to run from the car to the house so he wouldn't claw the back of our legs with his talons.

151

hatwobbleTayne t1_jcbd5qn wrote

Do the chickens have large talons?

99

Kaevek t1_jcbqiq1 wrote

They get larger as they age. Our oldest rooster have several inch long talons that are pretty sharp. Our youngest one has stumpy little ones haha

54

hatwobbleTayne t1_jcbvtqc wrote

I was making a Napoleon Dynamite reference, a bit of a deep cut I guess LOL

45

Kailmo t1_jcco2x7 wrote

I heard his voice when I read it.

6

higster94 t1_jcde7i3 wrote

Even better haha!!! Past our prime lol. We could both probably throw a football over them mountains

3

MauPow t1_jcdmo0s wrote

Woulda won state if coach'd put me in, no doubt in my mind

3

HouseOfSteak t1_jcd3om8 wrote

While this is a Napoleon Dynamite reference, roosters actually do have a track record for killing people.

Jump, claw, femoral artery.

Dead in 4 minutes.

1

higster94 t1_jcddyck wrote

Haha!

“You think someone wants to take a roundhouse to the face, while I’m wearing a pair of these badboys?!? FORGET ABOUT IT!”

1

X_Irradiance t1_jcdo9fj wrote

I’m wearing those exact pants right now. They’re extremely comfortable.

1

Kuhn_Dog t1_jcak18v wrote

My friend had a rooster when we were in middle school. I remember walking onto his patio with a pizza that we were going to eat and the rooster chased me across the yard until I threw a pizza slice at him. He ate the pizza and left us alone after haha. They can be mean bastards

50

Tom1255 t1_jcblizn wrote

My brother used to be scared of a certain aggressive rooster when he was like 5 or 6. Rooster would always chase him down around the yard, and tried to attack his head, by jumping/flying into my brother.

Thas was until my dad gave my brother a solid wooden stick, and send him on the yard with it. Rooster attacked as usual, but got beaten the shit out of by my brother with the help of the stick. Rooster never attempted to bother him again.

31

Hooliganisms t1_jccgps9 wrote

Ha I just watched my aunt's chickens for a week. She has two roosters. One spurred me (he had been de spurred cause my aunt got sick of his shit) twice within 5 mins of being there. It still hurt especially since he got me in the knee. The other rooster attacked him for attacking me. I would cheer him on. He tried a third time I kicked in the head gave him a factory reset. He didn't fuck with me for two days. Then tried it again and I hit him in the head with an empty food scoop. After that he didn't do anything for the rest of the week.

9

GrandmasBoyToy69 t1_jccgkyf wrote

I would of had fresh fried-chicken after the first week of that

2

ammonium_bot t1_jcckn42 wrote

> i would of had

Did you mean to say "would have"?
Explanation: You probably meant to say could've/should've/would've which sounds like 'of' but is actually short for 'have'.
Total mistakes found: 3839
^^I'm ^^a ^^bot ^^that ^^corrects ^^grammar/spelling ^^mistakes. ^^PM ^^me ^^if ^^I'm ^^wrong ^^or ^^if ^^you ^^have ^^any ^^suggestions.
^^Github

13

elscallr t1_jccveki wrote

The rooster followed you too, he just had different intentions.

0

Ichthyologist t1_jcar33i wrote

A cow nearly stomped a relative of mine to death on his dairy farm, so some of them are assholes; particularly if they have a calf.

30

Ichthyologist t1_jcbf42z wrote

Edit: I see the vegans are down voting. He ran a small, clean, pasture grazed dairy farm in Central NY for 45 years. Those cattle were happy.

21

Academic_Gazelle_340 t1_jcc3maj wrote

> I see the vegans are down voting

Sure, make this about identity politics rather than facing the fact that he was needlessly exploiting and harming animals.

In that industry, their calves are taken from them and you even specified that the cows were 'assholes' more so when they had calves.

I wonder why your uncle was nearly stomped to death and why these cows were becoming more hostile and aggressive after having calves in an industry where those calves are taken from them for further exploitation and abuse. 🤔

−14

Ichthyologist t1_jcc67me wrote

This is exactly why I said that. Thank you for the perfect example.

14

EcoEchos t1_jcc8dbm wrote

> I see people who are against animal abuse are down voting

There, I fixed it for you.

Sorry not sorry your relative was almost killed by the animals they were exploiting and abusing for profit.

Vegans aren't to blame for people identifying and acknowledging the cows are not the assholes in your story.

−15

Raul_Coronado t1_jccjia5 wrote

Morality is relative, if the storyteller says someone or something is an asshole thats it. You can tell your own story, which you did, but since you don’t have any access to the primary source its not surprising if your version doesn’t have a sense of authenticity.

7

Academic_Gazelle_340 t1_jcck3zv wrote

> its not surprising if your version doesn’t have a sense of authenticity.

Right, because exploitation and abuse aren't inherently part of the dairy industry.

No wait, those industries would not exist if not for the exploitation and abuse.

It should not be surprising that animals would become defensive over their children in such industries.

−2

ThugExplainBot t1_jccq16n wrote

Gets mad at identity politics, literally uses identity politics to assume his uncle was a bad cattle raiser.

4

Academic_Gazelle_340 t1_jchnzrz wrote

His uncle was needlessly harming and exploiting those animals for his own profits. It's literally inherently part of the business he chose to run.

What does identity politics have anything to do with that?

Am I also playing into identity politics by saying a Bus driver drives buses?

I think you're confusing job title with identity politics bud.

1

lnfinity OP t1_jcc1ec3 wrote

I bet they weren't happy when their calves were separated from them. What happened to the male calves who would never produce milk?

−15

Academic_Gazelle_340 t1_jcc453y wrote

He ran a dairy farm (where calves are taken from the parents and the cows are exploited and abused) yet he has the nerve to call the cows the assholes for becoming more hostile and aggressive over protecting their calves...

−10

Ichthyologist t1_jcc6v24 wrote

These cows were NOT abused. I get where you're coming from, I do. But you don't know, so don't claim that you do.

I'm a conservation biologist and a vegetarian and I worked on that farm as a teen. They were treated as well as household pets.

You don't get to say I've got the "nerve" when you're making sweeping generalizations yourself.

16

Academic_Gazelle_340 t1_jcc7u2q wrote

What happened to all the male cows who could not produce milk?

How did cows become pregnant in the first place?

You can claim and shout that they weren't abused all you like if that helps convince yourself. Abuse is inherent in the industry.

edit: Notice how this user refused to answer any of these very simple questions while continuing to shout "iTz nOt AbUsE!".

Yep, very convincing.

−8

Ichthyologist t1_jcc9g31 wrote

You think grazing animals in the wild aren't pregnant every year? You think AI is abuse? This is why you get kickback from society. You have no room for gray in your black and white world.

14

Academic_Gazelle_340 t1_jcclr4h wrote

> You don't think grazing animals in the wild aren't pregnant every year

How does this justify forcefully inseminating them (aka raping them) as a human?

> You have no room for gray in your black and white world.

Correct. I will not compromise when it comes to needlessly violently exploiting and abusing innocent animals for pleasure. There is no room for that form of 'grey' in my world.

Abusing and exploiting animals for pleasure is not necessary. This is a simple fact that also does not concern itself with making room for "gray".

> This is why you get kickback from society.

Nope. It's because these simple facts challenge consumer behaviors and pleasures that people's egos are attached to.

Exposure to this information over time will weaken the ego so these people can accept these simple facts and this trend is already observable on this platform. There is far less "kickback" from society the more educated society becomes on this topic and the information is spreadsing. The same exact dynamic also played out for the public's perception of cannabis. The masses were propagandized against it for ages and also "kickbacked" in the face of simple facts on the topic. Facts are facts, however. The ego can only try to block out facts for so long before eventually realizing the fact wasn't ever the problem, but the ego's attachment to the topic at hand.

−5

Ichthyologist t1_jcctmvb wrote

Right. So it's not worth having a debate with you.

3

Academic_Gazelle_340 t1_jchmfum wrote

Because there is no debate to be had.

Sorry not sorry it offended your fragile ego to discover abusing and exploiting animals is not necessary. Simple facts do not concern themselves with the 'debates' of fragile egos.

edit: I love how you also refused to answer the most simple of questions in this thread (posed by different users) which would reveal whether or not those cows were treated well. Keep trying to convince yourself though.

0

GalacticDystopia t1_jcbxseh wrote

First I've heard of cows being dicks. I mean, I'm sure a bull can be dickish, but the cows? Have yet to encounter a mean one.

Quite the contrary. Any group of cows I've been around tend to slowly surround me as if I'm some deity about to address them.

Awesome creatures, they are

9

kungfubellydancer t1_jcbxdw7 wrote

We have a lot of chickens but one in particular named Slim Thug is a sneaky little fucker when he wants to be. He can’t ever win against our other rooster Muff-head who is much bigger and has longer spurs than him, so he takes out his frustration on us whenever he sees us bending down and tries to spur us from behind. He also takes offense to images on our pants and especially hates my Nightmare Before Christmas pajama pants and will try to spur Jack Skellington on them.

7

ChizzleFug t1_jcbyx5j wrote

Roosters will try to fuck up anything, regardless of it's size to protect their hen(s). Even something like a mountain lion, a rooster will not back down and just die.

7

txlessor t1_jccqt4n wrote

Mine, RIP, came defective. Hawk attacking the hens? I'll run away without a sound. Me, who brings food, water, and treats. He would make the warning sound every time and try to attack every 6 months... He would charge me then get punted across the yard and behave for another 6 months.

7

LukeDude759 t1_jcc6g49 wrote

I remember a cow charged at me once when I was at my uncle's farm when I was maybe five years old. Thankfully he picked me up over the fence before it could trample me.

2

AcedPower t1_jcdv7fy wrote

My mom has a flock of chickens. Two of her roosters tried jumping me, one from the right, one from the left. Personally, I've never met a rooster that's not an asshole.

2

b1ack1323 t1_jcd0pen wrote

My eighth birthday, I was walking back to my house from the yard. The rooster started coming after me, so I started sprinting. It was the one fucking day my parents locked the house. Ever. In 17 years living with them, one time.

That rooster clawed and pecked the fuck out of my legs.

It’s okay though, a month later he tremors coming after me while I was riding my dirt bike.

The dirt bike definitely won.

0

theroadlesstraveledd t1_jcd145r wrote

There are only sweet cows. Roosters can be evil or just butter bellies and sometimes both I know a rooster who has preferences and was butter to some and evil to everyone else

0

Epena501 t1_jcbhfz2 wrote

Had a baby chick that was lovable when small. It turned out to be a rooster and when it hit adulthood it was a feathered Velociraptor that owned our backyard. You couldn’t go back there without being chased around by this evil spawn.

13

zeke235 t1_jcaxcxl wrote

Sometimes you get both in the same rooster!

2

MaracaBalls t1_jcb74q8 wrote

If raised as a pet they will be sweet, I used to have one; sadly I can no longer pet my cock. I miss my cock

2

the_goodnamesaregone t1_jcctzcf wrote

I wound up with more roosters than can fit in my laying flock. 2 of them just chill with the goats. It's interesting to watch the dynamic. They're just like, "welp, I guess we're with you guys now."

2

ellecon t1_jces719 wrote

A cock is either your best friend or your worst enemy

2

Numarx t1_jca54xz wrote

lol, cracking up at the small slips every time he makes a slight turn.

340

snacholo t1_jcah1xj wrote

Totally, like a little kick out drift or something, too funny 😂🤣

24

LegendaryOutlaw t1_jcana4d wrote

I wish it had sound so I could hear his little toes click-clacking on the floor.

8

MumrikDK t1_jcbn5i2 wrote

One of the entertaining parts about having a dog too. Indoor skids.

1

ElectricalRabbit1572 t1_jcbmqzc wrote

"get back here! I swear to god ima fuck you up! ... Wait.. don't pick me up! If only I had hands!!"

0

stemel0001 t1_jcbewex wrote

I've had chickens and anytime I see these videos all I can think about is the amount of shit they need to clean up after letting the chicken inside.

129

riegspsych325 t1_jcbypxs wrote

my buddy has some ex housemates who he heard tried to have a chicken coop in their bathroom. Thankfully, they attempted this at their next residence and unsurprisingly, it did not go very well

26

Z80AssemblerWasEasy t1_jcce20k wrote

Any bird. Even when they spent most of their time inside a cage. Stuff flies everywhere. And little budgies like to nibble at wallpaper, just walls, and other things.

Still, birds are cute, so it's a hard decision.... I already have a couple of names for chickens but I don't have any. They also like catching mice (and then create a bloody mess because they don't have hands and folks and plates)!

13

Lieutenant_0bvious t1_jccqw5h wrote

But Gumi is sooooo cute and funny! It makes me want one. If only to get a little xylophone so I can see him toss the mallet angrily.

1

matlynar t1_jccd53e wrote

Same here. I have 5 chickens in my backyard. They are super cute and stuff, but I never considered having one inside my house because it would be... well... shitty.

2

Sausagedogknows t1_jca5wyz wrote

Whut in tarn, I say, whut in tarnation?

66

Adama0001 t1_jcbr7c8 wrote

Now..now…now hear me out boyyy. Ya gotta fix that hole in the floooor before I hurt Ma’self, I say, ya gotta fix that hole.

16

HotKnifeUpAss t1_jcavqft wrote

That grate in the floor was giving me anxiety for the chick's little feets.

55

CantankerousOctopus t1_jcch5gd wrote

I had one of those in the house where I grew up. I was running around with one of the neighbor kids when he tripped and fell onto it. It tore up his palms and knees really bad. He was lucky a finger didn't get stuck as he slid. I never ran past it again.

7

CakeIceCream t1_jccro2y wrote

10000%! My guinea pig hurt his foot in a grate growing up. :(

1

pitcjd01 t1_jcaegd1 wrote

The Fast and the Feathered: Tokyo Drift

20

MrVeazey t1_jcblc68 wrote

Nobody's going to talk about those beautiful wood floors? /r/centuryhomes would be livid.

9

e-wrecked t1_jcbx4u8 wrote

When you only know one person at the party.

5

StillN0tATony t1_jcakp7i wrote

The live action Chicken Run looks pretty good...

3

BothRead8 t1_jcb1yu3 wrote

Look at that wooden register cover! Nice. Looks like something I had in a house in Minnesota years ago. Loved those Craftsman style touches.

3

grewupnointernetmom t1_jcblpls wrote

Kids I’m old now, but back when I was about 4 years old, an older sister (8 years older) took my (2 years younger) sister and I to visit new chicks born at our next door neighbors place. Somehow I got left behind and trapped in the hen house by the rooster. I remember him slowly pacing back back and forth at the door while making a dreadful noise as I stood paralyzed. Finally, he came at me, scratched my face and I ran out and back home. The next thing I remember is seeing my big brother using a shovel to remove its head.

It was not the rooster’s fault I had been left there. I felt relief when the rooster was dead. To this day I do NOT like roosters.

3

xoecksohgossipgirl t1_jcc0n4y wrote

>there I was.. TRAPPED in my enclosure with this 2 legged beast.. I had never seen a creature so intimidating in my short life. They just stood there.. staring at me.. menacingly.. I tried my best to make a defensive stance and loud noises to scare the threat away, but it only intensified his gaze. I decided it was now or never.

>I run straight at the threat, not sure if I would make it out alive. To my surprise, thrashing wildly in his vicinity was enough to remove him from the situation. I thought I was safe, until a larger two legged beast showed up moments later, this time with an extendable arm..

>The next moment I knew, was darkness.

-The Rooster

6

grewupnointernetmom t1_jchlinq wrote

Both of us were 2 legged beasts. The rooster was not the one trapped in the hen house, I was, and my life at the time was shorter than his.

1

Elsier t1_jcca82d wrote

It’s missing the sound of his funny chicken feet slipping on the floor at every turn 😄

2

GapingFartLocker t1_jcasw3d wrote

I have a hen that does this whenever I'm in the back yard. She follows me everywhere, then when I stop she pecks the shit out of me until I give her snacks. None of the other chickens do this

1

nickalias t1_jcavh0l wrote

Looks like he ran a fowl.

1

Kaevek t1_jcbqedr wrote

That's a sweet rooster.

1

Varkoth t1_jcbzeh7 wrote

Needs the chocobo theme.

1

hamsolo19 t1_jcc1tky wrote

I love the little wipe out coming around the bend 😆

1

cadeawayy t1_jccg8lj wrote

My chicken was the same. She knew her name, and would run over to me whenever I called her.

1

genderpocalypse t1_jcda2rq wrote

I've never seen a chicken drift around corners 🤣

1

triciann t1_jcdaymr wrote

He’s so pretty.

1

GreenGod42069 t1_jcdb3hr wrote

Somehow I have a feeling that the video would be much more adorable with sound.

1

spartanEZE t1_jcdyg1d wrote

Lmao! That run of his is fantastic. Maybe the best chicken run i've ever seen.

1

foodude84 t1_jce1syf wrote

BAWK! I'm sorry, I thought you was corn.

1

MustangSallyTrevino t1_jce8w42 wrote

Little Jerry just ran from my apartment to Newman’s in 20 seconds! Is that good? I don’t know…

1

Build68 t1_jceehl1 wrote

A rooster can be a pretty fun pet

1

8565 t1_jcc55r7 wrote

My best friend growing up was a Serama (basically a smaller version of this Japanese Bantam) like this one named "Goofball" he followed me everywhere and was the world's best showmanship bird.

0

Cannedseaslug t1_jcc7z4f wrote

The Naruto run was modeled after this. Very efficient.

0

BottasHeimfe t1_jcc8wyg wrote

I’ve got a friend who’s got a rooster and a bunch of Chickens and they’re all very good birds.

0

z0mad t1_jcc9t9m wrote

Nice rooster 🐓

0

darkslide3000 t1_jccb2sn wrote

She sure seems to be a cock magnet...

0

jmsatl t1_jcccice wrote

I'm glad his foot didnt get stuck in the grate

0

xiaolinstyle t1_jcceaql wrote

No one gonna talk about the socks and SANDALS?!

0

Kenlaboss t1_jccfvbh wrote

Animals are just so wacky.

0

mynameisipswitch t1_jcclv2y wrote

Every morning waiting for the bus was me, my dad, my dog, and my rooster (who dad would have to grab so he didn’t come on the bus with me)

0

Mechronis t1_jccy6sz wrote

The way it just remains in place when it gets picked up has me cackling

0

Handyr t1_jccygol wrote

I like your floors!

0

lowkeyfree t1_jcd9ma1 wrote

What a whimsical fluff! Such well tailored pants!

0

Generous-Boi t1_jcatkln wrote

Tokyo drift chicken edition.

−1

southpaw85 t1_jcazy9i wrote

I need footage of this rooster slipping and falling on its rooster face.

−1

sassymaggie t1_jcbsg3u wrote

The floors are really clean.

−1

growsomegarlic t1_jcbwbvh wrote

"Why are we running?"

"What is the danger?"

"Oh my God, did it catch us?"

−1

madrascafe t1_jcbpiw0 wrote

follows her straight to the chopping block

−2

Mattt_MSI t1_jcbaz5k wrote

r/unexpectedcock

−3

Bullmilk82 t1_jcbgv02 wrote

The door is wide open for a reference about a C**k.

−3

Dsage777 t1_jcblec3 wrote

KFC: Kentucky’s Friendliest Chicken

−3

pmk5252 t1_jcbm7oz wrote

That's one fat cock.

−3

yanbag609 t1_jcaojrm wrote

f roosters they're cocks

−4

m33rcii t1_jcat49i wrote

I wish they were dumber, cause I don't think I'll ever stop eating chicken

−13

chloen0va t1_jcbk6nr wrote

I don’t personally think there’s anything wrong with animals husbandry and consumption.

It’s factory farming and the hell that animals have to live through just to become food, that’s the problem

2

report_all_criminals t1_jcbqe4s wrote

Nobody likes this process, but the market has proven that people dislike the financial cost of humane farming even more.

−2

chloen0va t1_jcbqyh0 wrote

Yea, because the financial cost is offset by the exceptional environmental damage that consumers don’t see, and the immense ethical issues that consumers also don’t see.

The market has only proven that it’s very effective to keep your consumers ignorant of the true cost of a product. Which is, I’d like to hope, becoming less and less of an issue over time.

5

m33rcii t1_jcfiljh wrote

Why did I get downvoted.. reddit sucks ass.

1

chloen0va t1_jcgq8c1 wrote

For me? Because you showed guilt, and then a refusal to even consider addressing your own guilt.

I feel guilt for eating chicken. I feel guilt for consuming factory farmed food. Ideally, when I have more money, I’ll source my chicken more humanely.

I guess it seemed like… the meat means more than the morals, to you? And you could’ve taken a more thoughtful approach and still continued to eat meat yknow?

1

m33rcii t1_jcrw1hp wrote

Where did I mention anything about factory farmed food? Why did you assume I eat factory farmed chicken?

1

zer0huntr t1_jcaglhj wrote

Well, clearly somebody wants to be deep fried.

−18