The title feels pretentious (/prɪˈtɛnʃəs/)

Matched the energy perfectly

I’d gladly trade my witty comment for that grub

Everybody needs to know a little Italian.

Why have people downvoted me, I literally gave the award

[removed]

Oh fuck yes. My favorite book quote about love involves Bruschetta:

"I need love like I need a Bruschetta (that is BRU-SKE-TAH, not BROO-SHE-TAH), a slender piece of Ciabatta, toasted and brushed with garlic and oil and covered in fresh basil and tomato. The chunks inevitably fall off the bread and the olive oil runs all over your hand, over your lips and down your chin. The whole thing is delicious, deeply physical, and delightfully undignified...  and a woman who can eat a real Bruschetta is a woman you can love.. and who can love you.  Someone who pushes the thing away because it is messy, is never going to cackle at you toothlessly across the living room of your retirement apartment, or drag you back from your sixth heart at**k by sheer furious affection. It would never happen...  You need a woman who isn't afraid of a face full of olive oil for that kind of love.. "

Recipe/method

My ingredients:

21 tomato’s (3x7 punnet) A whole large garlic, it was 12 cloves 30g bunch of fresh basil Baguette Extra virgin olive oil Maldon salt flakes Black pepper MSG Balsamic vinegar

Bruschetta can be made 2 days ahead of time, crostini can be made 1 day ahead of time, or prepped and frozen, then cook on the day!

Cut a pyramid/cone shape into the top of all tomato’s to take out the stem core bit, only about 1cm deep.

Half all tomato’s.

Scoop the seeds/water bit out of every tomato. Not the flesh/skin.

Slice each half into half again so you have 1/4 of tomato, slice the 1/4s into julienne, then a dice the same width as the julienne.

I then minced my garlic with a knife really fine, you can use a micro plane if you want.

Pluck all the leaves of the basil bunch, stack them on top of each other, maybe 10 a time, stems all facing same way, roll it up like a doobie, then slice it chiffonade from the tip to the stem.

Combine garlic, tomato and basil in a bowl, add extra virgin olive oil to combine, I probably used around 1/2 a cup, but this can vary based on tomato size/quantity, so use just enough to combine, then season and taste it to see if you need more.

Season with salt, msg and black pepper to taste. Seasoning is to taste, if you prefer it saltier, or more peppery, add more.

MSG works well with it but bare in mind you should substitute some salt for MSG if you use both. MSG occurs naturally in tomato’s, so additional MSG makes it especially tomatoy.

The crostini/bread is sliced baguette, tossed with salt, pepper and extra virgin olive oil, bake at 200 for 5-10 mins or desired crispyness.

Serve the bruschetta on the crostini with a drizzle of balsamic vinegar.

Removing the seeds from the tomato’s helps keep them crispy and less soggy over time. Which means you can either serve them all pre-made on the provision that they are being eaten right away, but their integrity won’t suffer.

Or serve them as a tray and bowl so people can self serve, with a spoon, no doubling dipping with crostinis here.