I'm seeing a lot of judgementalism going on in this thread from people who don't know you and don't know your circumstances.

Everyone has had some trauma in their life; a few lucky ones have had only minor incidents that barely count, and too many unlucky ones have had serious trauma. Most people fit in between.

Trauma affects your brain, physically — yes, genuinely, e.g. the amygdala might be enlarged. It also affects how you make decisions in life, and your internal thoughts and beliefs about yourself.

Unresolved trauma, or keeping unhelpful patterns of thought and behaviour as a result of your upbringing, leads to unhappiness and, in bad cases, to dysfunctional behaviour that causes distress to both yourself and to others.

The purpose of therapy is to undo the damage (although you can't undo physical changes to your brain, your brain is "plastic" and you can overcome it) to allow you to lead a better life — happier, more fulfilled, and a part of society.

If you've seen 14 therapists and none of them has helped, either you are seeing the wrong type of therapists (there are different types who use different methods), or you have a deep internal fear of changing your thoughts and behaviour. Or maybe both.

I wish you the best of luck in finding someone suitable for you.