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Don’t the Germans have anything else to talk about besides the US pandemic?

Yes, the Austrian pandemic.

Putting these long titles diagonally is kinda the opposite of beautiful, very hard to read. Horizontal bars would've been a much better choice.

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what the fuck, I just looked it up and most of it was done by one single person and it's ridiculously detailed

The title was very confusing, thought there were excerpts of the articles but no its just size of the longest articles in bytes lol

Its not view count but size of the article. It probably contains a lot of pictures and graphics. The most viewed German Wikipedia articles are WikiLeaks, Two and a half men, Hamburg (City in Germany) and Germany.