I’d honestly just drive into the other car.

Ohhhh how I would have LOVED getting out demolition derby style......4am is too early for road rage.

Good for you! That's a crazy tight spot I would have given up. I see your not a quitter, way to go buddy.

You’re the worst type of person, just park somewhere else.

OP said he got out, not in. I took that to mean someone else parked like a jerk behind him, making it hard to get out

Ah okay, the other guy is a psychopath.

it's always the stupid kind car type. I swear every time i get blocked in like this it's this exact car but usually green.

Having one inch of space between cars is truly not uncommon and I’d rather that than 3 feet of space between every car wasting potential parking spots. Downvote away but clearly you didn’t grow up here if you think a) only psychopaths squeeze into spots and b) getting out of a spot like that can’t be done.

They are made to be bumped.