Getting better at DNFing books

Submitted by deepug9787 t3_10n9tfh in books

I just want to share my two cents on how to get better at DNFing books because I see a lot of people here who struggle with this. And I kind of understand that because I too struggled with it back when I was just getting started with reading books. I managed to finally overcome that phase when I realized that it was simply a matter of being more confident. Books are, after all, subjective things, just like paintings. And if I don't like a book, well...I don't like it, and that's all there's to it. All the glowing reviews in the world isn't going to change my opinion on it one bit. Sure, sometimes I do go back and re-read a book years later only to find out that I was wrong about it the first time around, but for the most part, I don't think twice before DNFing these days.

If I'm not mistaken, part of the reason is also the pressure that people seem to put on themselves to come across as a "well-read" person (whatever that means). Fortunately for me, I never had that problem. I've no problem admitting that I'm not a voracious reader. And in any case, I find book lovers who have unusual interests far more interesting than the ones who have simply read every book in every best-selling list out there.

I also tend to avoid talking about the number of books I've read, my reading goals etc. I understand that some people share these metrics to motivate themselves to read more, but personally, I think the best way to motivate yourself is to find a book that you love. And to find the ones you love, you ruthlessly ditch the ones you don't.

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Ineffable7980x t1_j67ve5x wrote

You make it interesting point about putting a book aside, and maybe returning to it and a number of years. I think it's totally valid that sometimes you're not in the right mind space for a book. What doesn't work for you today, might work for you in 5 years.

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StephanXX t1_j69275y wrote

Why is there a DNF thread nearly every day? Enjoy a book, or don't. It's a hobby, not a career.

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BookishBitching t1_j680wxl wrote

I never used to dnf books. It felt a little like an unfinished assignment, maybe? The first book I ever dnfd was one by Kate Atkinson. Everyone told me it was astounding, transformative, life changing. I dragged myself along, a couple of pages at a time, for weeks.

Finally I looked up the big twist ending, roles my eyes, and gave it to a friend. I'm glad I didn't waste my time on it - I understand the point the book was trying to make, but it's a point I've already been firm on for many years so it was wasted on me anyway.

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Josh6x6 t1_j67nids wrote

Totally agree. It took me a while to convince myself that it was OK to 'DNF' a book. There's just that expectation that you have to finish every book - and I say, that's not true at all. If it's not holding your interest, put it down and pick up something else.

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jawnbaejaeger t1_j685azh wrote

I'm at the point in my life where I DNF books (mostly) without guilt.

In fact, I just deleted Thursday Murder Club AND You'll Grow Out of it from my kindle. The first one, I got about 20 pages in and just didn't vibe with it. The second one, after about 27%, I realized I couldn't relate to this straight, white, wealthy woman's neurotic problems.

Onto something good.

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ISayISayISay t1_j681mjv wrote

I'm great at it - there are too many books to read, and life is too short, to waste it on those I'm not enjoying.

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GrandMagnificent t1_j68uslw wrote

DNF'd for the first time in ages with The Atlas Six. The fact that >!the 'big secret' hinted at for >50% of the book was literally in the blurb!< pushed me over the edge. Liberating!

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Trudi1201 t1_j698oai wrote

I read for entertainment and escapism. If the book doesn't give me what I am looking for I have no problem returning it to the library. I can always try it again another time.

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BadJujabee t1_j6auvg4 wrote

I have finished entire series even though I disliked the first one. Very masochistic of me lol

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BookAbandoner t1_j6boxwb wrote

For me, book quitting is almost cathartic once the decision is made, because up until then, I have weird anxiety that results in me questioning myself & it feels like a bigger decision than it actually is? I think it’s sort of a book FOMO & not wanting to miss out on something special just because that particular book isn’t resonating with me, so my mind wonders if it’s just not my type of book or if it’s not the right time or something else, idk.

But either way, I’ve found that after so many times of feeling dread abt having to open a book I really I want to like but just don’t, leaning into my gut impulse & removing it from my sight (digital & physical) comes with resistance but quickly feels empowering in some ways once I commit to the decision!

May or may not see that book again but I’ll quit caring abt it & will be happier for it. Sometimes saying fuck it and moving on is a gift in itself

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PJsinBed149 t1_j6b57qz wrote

I actually have a goal to DNF 10 books this year. I often stick it out with books that just are working for me. Now, I'll get to "accomplish" part of my reading goals by putting the book down.

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