It’s ok to care my dude! And knowing these things and recognizing them for what they are is fine and dandy. But despondency doesn’t have to be the logical conclusion of that knowledge.

Bearing witness to death (on an individual or grand scale) can be sad but doesn’t have to be depressing. It can be beautiful. Going down the path of despondency and depression is self-indulgent and centers your own melancholy above all else.

I recently read a book called ‘A heart that works’. Written by rob Delaney, about the death of his baby son, Henry. It may give you a window into grief, and to how to go about grieving. It sounds like you need to grieve what you see as being lost, otherwise this will continue to fester.