I've been there, also right before Christmas. Unemployment is such a demoralizing awful mess of a system. It's not you, don't let them make you feel bad about yourself. The money was pretty terrible but it did get me through. I ended up taking a shitty job for two years and I'm working to get back where I was and sometimes I still get SO mad about it. But I believe it will work out for you too, all my best wishes to you.