Speaking as a widower, I have experienced elements of those stages along with many other emotions. They are constantly mixed and not in a particular order. When first learning about them, I never thought I’d experience denial or bargaining. Denial was different than I’d expected. It wasn’t that I denied she was gone, it was more the frequent feeling that I’d see her when I turned a corner or hear her reply to something the way I’m used to her doing.

I think you become so accustomed to a person’s presence in your life that part of your brain continues to expect/ anticipate their reaction.

I don’t think I’ve experienced bargaining, but I’ve seen other widows do it. I believe she is where she belongs and I would never want to rip her from that paradise for my own selfish needs. I only wait until I can join her again.

The anger is real, it peaks at one point, but like the pain and depression, it never completely goes away and they flare up from time to time, even after acceptance.