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wiltyspinach t1_j6nnvmr wrote

Eric was a resource manager for a Fortune 500 company not even fifteen days ago. Now, he’s a monster with four bug eyes, antennae, and a thorax with humanoid arms and legs, who, because he has a mouth, opposable thumbs, and can squirt ink from his abdomen, has to help in sorting out what can or can’t be allowed in this new… society.

“Look, Mr. Benson,” Eric says, his four arms on his desk, his hands clapped together. “I just don’t see how we can allow this.”

“She’s my wife,” Mr. Benson, a portly looking elephant thing, snorts through his tusks, his ears flared, his arms motioning towards the thing sitting next to him.

“She’s a bug,” Eric points out, one hand motioning towards the grotesque, fly looking creature sitting on the seat beside him.

You’re a bug!” Mr. Benson shouts, tooting out of his trunk.

“I am an insectoid. Though I do understand your frustration, Mr. Benson,” Eric says. He motions to Mrs. Benson, “Ma’am, can you tell your husband you love him?”

Her giant honeycomb eyes never seem to move as she rotates her body to look in his direction. There’s a glossiness in Mr. Bensons eyes as he takes her little… hand things in his. Eric was glad he could not see himself, because quite frankly it was a disgusting sight.

She buzzes.

“I love you, too,” Mr. Benson whispers back, his snout touching the slick skin beneath her eyes that could only be her cheek.

“Mrs. Benson,” Eric says. “Can you tell your husband that you hate him?”

Her body turns to him, and then turns back, and she buzzes in the same, very irritating way. He wanted to smack her, but all four of his arms open up.

“See, Mr. Benson. There is no way for anyone to distinguish what it is she is saying. For her own safety, for yours, and for everyone else’s, we are going to have to deny your petition to transfer your marriage license. I- I understand you’re upset, but if you would calm down for a moment, I can give you directions to the Placement Department, and they can assist you in placing her with… her own kind.”

Eric takes one of his hands, and rubs the tip of his abdomen, trying not look as aroused as it made him feel, and stamps the giant leaf with his hand.

Next!

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selfStartingSlacker t1_j6pgcmj wrote

> can squirt ink from his abdomen

finally found a writer with the same murky sense of humor

echoing the other commenter and also, I like your style. (Not surprisingly, it does remind me of mine. Ehem, I 'll se myself out.)

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FoxTrotRoyale t1_j6p9612 wrote

This is really nice. I like how you kept it short and brief, but made it fun and whimsical. Like the fact they're bugs trying to get their marriage right is funny--and original. I think this is cool.

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wiltyspinach t1_j6pecmb wrote

If there’s anything humans can do is make sure there is some semblance of order and use their skills to achieve that, before falling back into the old ways of taking advantage of each other and finding things to hate one another for lol society is still there, but it’s just gonna be weird and fun for a bit lol

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