"Oh, don't worry. I know a guy. See my cousin Pedro - you know Pedro, he's this little guy with a lisp, kids have always bullied him for it but he's gotten a lot better since he's started working with that doctor, the language doctor, whatever they're called - see, Pedro knows a guy, a banker-type fella, works in Wall Street he says, right?"

"Uh-huh."

"So this Wall Street guy says 'Look, Pedro, my good friend, whom I cherish like the brother I have so tragically lost in a bus accident when I was but a wee boy, spawning a life-long disdain towards public transport, I know this will be immensely useful to you. The wood market in Brazil is going up, so you really should invest now.' Now, Pedro, he's smart, right?"

"Yep."

"So Pedro asks 'But Brian' - that's the Wall Street guy ya see - 'How do you know about that? Isn't that insider trading?' And Brian just goes 'See Pedro, you're smart, but don't worry. See, I know a guy, a local in Brazil, Emmanuel is his name, and we had brunch recently when he was visiting - you know the little place on 6^(th) street, with the great garlic bread - and he tells me 'Brian, my good friend, you know about the Brazillian wood mafia' and Brian goes 'Why, I do not, Emmanuel my good friend, please do tell me' so Emmanuel-"

"DUDE!"

"What?"

"Do you have a pencil I can borrow or not?"

"Oh. Sure, here you go. Got LOADS of pencils nowadays - I was just getting to that, you see? Because Emmanuel apparently knew that Brian would like to invest in..."