Submitted by SomeSortOfUser t3_z7xz2x in WritingPrompts
WIHachillies t1_iy9byl7 wrote
Nox was an English teacher at Inanoi Middle School and was currently tutoring one of their favorite kids. She was always well-behaved in class, always getting student of the month. Her name is Nay. Pointing out something was wrong with her essay, "You forgot your period again." It was a simple mistake, but she quickly corrected it. Nay subconsciously picked up her phone. Nox went to ask to put it down. Then she quickly started packing up her stuff.
"Thank you, Mx. Nox! My mom is here!" The girl cheered as she packed up all her papers.
"I'll walk you to the door to see you off." They cooed and playfully ruffled the kid's hair.
Amber whined about her hair being messed up but skipped towards the door and opened it, beckoning her teacher to follow. Nox followed, giggling softly as they made their way to the front of the school. Amber was rambling about her day but wasn't paying much attention. They were thinking about going on patrol soon and, hopefully; they don't run into their nemesis. It's so annoying to deal with their teasing and flirting, making them feel these stupid emotions. They shook their head trying to get rid of the thought of their nemesis. Amber rubbed against Nox's leg trying to grab their attention. "My mom is here!"
Paying attention, Nox looked down and then up to see someone that she was at least expecting. That damn Nemesis has a kid, and that kid is my student. Some petty revenge won't hurt anyone, right? "Hey Amber, is it okay I meet your mom?" Nox asked gently.
Amber looked up and tilted her head, raising one of her eyebrows curiously. Shrugging her shoulders, she kept skipping along until she arrived in front of her mom. "Hey, Mom! Meet Mx. Nox. This is my teacher." Her tone was cheerful.
Her mom looked at Nox, raising her hand to shake before examining their frame. "Oh!" A small grin appeared on her face, "Mx. Nox? I see, you didn't tell me you have such a beautiful teacher." Seductive tone almost immediate.
Nox didn't want to stand for this for once. "Amber, I didn't know you had such a pretty mom." Giggling a little.
The mom flushed wasn't expecting such a comment and shot Nox a soft glare before shoving her kid in the car. "Let's go, Amber! I have work to do." She cackled as she got in and rode off.
CoffeeBoom t1_iy9oq86 wrote
Nice, by the way how do you pronounce Mx ?
MiniTurtle68029 t1_iy9prnu wrote
Just like Mix!
WIHachillies t1_iy9udaa wrote
Mix!! it just means non binary !!
Astro_Venatas t1_iy9wjcx wrote
Non binary teacher is cool
WIHachillies t1_iy9wo5r wrote
trying to get representation for as many as i can when I write
Astro_Venatas t1_iya21ju wrote
I should to. But I don’t write enough. But I did make a lesbian character the other day.
AdmiralAthena t1_iya5zvp wrote
Who is Nay?
WIHachillies t1_iyakrkh wrote
Amber !! I had the idea to make a subplot mid way through.
thundergun661 t1_iya67f1 wrote
Her name was Nay then it was Amber im confused
Is she going by a different name and not telling the mom yet?
WIHachillies t1_iyakq2f wrote
ah yeah !! i had the idea midway through. I'm sorry if that wasn't clear
Fontaigne t1_iycg6wr wrote
Okay, some pronoun confusion at the start. "Their" could have been "Inanoi Middle school's", and "she" would reference Nox. If you reorder it a bit, you can eliminate that kathunk.
Something on the order of
>Nox watched Nay as she blah blah.
However, two characters with three letter non-gendered names in a single paragraph is an unnecessary barrier to the reader for a flash story. Ah, looks like you changed to Amber and missed the first paragraph?
>playfully ruffled
Nope nope nope. Teachers do not touch kids.
>rubbed against her leg
WTF. Your "hero" is a molester? And has convinced the kid to change her name?
SMDH.
WIHachillies t1_iycolsr wrote
Thank you for your critique !! I was kinda out of it I was writing mostly, I was working on some homework but that's no excuse !!
I wasn't thinking of Nox being a molester. And that wasn't a reason why Nox convinced to change her name, There was another reason that haven't been revealed yet. I asked a couple of my friends and they said it's okay for teachers to touch kids as long as it isn't like that. I imagined as it as playfully ruffling. But i understand, I'll rewrite it :))
Viewing a single comment thread. View all comments