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Ok-Night8301 t1_ixwbsji wrote

Reply to comment by Kerrim66 in [WP] The . . . creature . . . has been following you for weeks now, but nobody else can see it. It just sits there, staring, grinning. Then one day you look across the coffee shop and see a young woman with another one right behind her. Your eyes meet . . . by ImmortalJadeEye

I really like this concept. only thing I would say is that u say “it was like” a lot. use different similes, like “as though” “as if” “appeared to be” etc

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