“Hey hey hey, woah, buddy. Hold on a second!” Edgy implores me, afraid. For the first time in the year I’ve had him, he’s afraid.

“Why? Why should I? Why, after everything, do you expect me to value your opinion?”

“Just hold on a second there. Look; if you kill yourself with me, I’ll be distraught! I may never get over the trauma of–”

I pull him back to plunge him through my stomach, but freeze when he changes tack.

“Okay! Okay! Message received; no more flippantly narcissistic comments!”

“Well,” I say, breathing heavily, “we seem to be at a crossroads, Edge.”

“Yeah. We do.”

“So what should I do?”

“Well, you could start by putting me down…?”

“Why?”

“Well, because killing yourself isn’t really a great idea–”

“No. That’s not what I meant,” I interject. “Why do you care?”

Edgy’s grip ices just slightly, but I’ve wielded him long enough to notice when he’s been caught out. He doesn’t speak, though.

“Why do you care if I live or die?”

Still silence.

“WHY DO YOU CARE!?” I yell, spittle flying, at the motionless blade, still threatening to impale myself upon him.

There’s a long pause. A long, long pause. After enough time has passed, and I know his outlook, I steady my hand again, and–

“Because I do,” Edgy says, quietly. “Because I care about you.”

“What?” I breathe, stunned.

“I care about you, Toby. I always have.”

“Oh, you’re taking the piss now,” I say, but don’t make a move with my hands.

“Okay, maybe not always, I’ll admit,” he says, shakily, “but for a long time now. I don’t know why I treated you like I did for so long. I don’t know why I let you– I don’t know why I pushed you to where you are now. But I’m sorry.”

“You are?” I ask, and tears well in my eyes.

“Yes,” Edge says. “I am. I really am.”

I drop him, stumbling backwards on shaky legs, staring at his gleaming blade, and he clatters to the ground.

“Ow! Hey! Idiot, get back here! Pick me back up!”

I let out a loose chuckle, which grows into a shaky laugh, and then into a fit of elated giggles.

“Okay,” I say, in between breaths, “but only if you do one thing for me.”

“What?”

“Say please,” I say.

And for the first time in the last year, I feel… happy.

I have something.

I have a friend.