"Apples are stupid, they don't even taste good."

"But what a nutrient-filled fruit! Apples make for strong people."

"One cannot live on apples alone."

"This does not make apples stupid, as you say."

"There is such variety of fruits out there, why choose apples?"

"Apples have a well-defined core, for one."

"Cores don't matter. Taste is what matters, and let me tell you about oranges. So juicy."

"There is far more to life than taste. Substance, for example."

"The flesh is temporal, taste is pretty much all that matters."

"Only in your twisted vision, Satan."

"I mean, if what you really want is for them to not touch the apples, you could do with less tasty fruit. Figs are native and would be a far better choice."

"The fruit must be tempting, or else there won't be a choice at all."

"Choices are boring. Just put the most scrumptious fruit out there for all to enjoy. What's the point of all this runaround?"

"We've been over this a thousand times Satan, but we need choices to make our world interesting. Your vision of the world will be as boring as all the predetermined ones that came before it."

"God, those predetermined worlds were good because they were optimal. Here we've created something so subpar that I almost don't want to put my name on it."

"Well, your role in this world is to lead them to quick decisions with ugly consequences, to encourage them to act on pure emotion instead of reason, and to close their minds, so your anti-choice nature makes perfect sense."

"So why do we have to do it your way again and use a stupid apple?"

"The apple is perfect. It is scrumptious enough to lead them to make a quick decision to grab one without thinking, yet unappealing enough for them to side with better judgment."

"It won't take me long to get them to eat it."

"I have more faith than that."