The dust whipped up around us as the convoy roared through the badlands, our horse constructs galloping along with the war carriage in tow. Our quarry was currently speeding down the tracks with a smoking hole in the roof of the caboose and Mr. Granitesoul tossing the dead guards out the back. The dragons overhead us started flying up to the front half of the train, enticed by the presence of riches. There was enough money on there to buy two whole continents and pit them against each other--but everyone who knew the Broken Axe Gang knew we didn't do shit for the money.

I pulled my horse up next to the caboose and had it leap at it. A set of spikes popped out of its side, jamming it into the side. I shot out the window and climbed inside, where Mr. Granitesoul was waiting for me. "Should be a straight shot to the vault, ma'am."

"Aw, don't tell me the odds, Richard," I replied with a wicked grin. "It's more fun beatin' them when you don't know what they are."

A guard wearing the Arcadian Polity crest burst into the car and shouted, "Stop! You are under arrest for violating--"

THUNK!

An arrow lodged itself clean through the guard's throat, sending him falling to the ground to let his blood fill his airway. Through the open door emerged three more members of my crew: Glokk the orc, in his three-piece suit and bowler hat, Saguaro the elf, with his body decked out in warpaint and his bow in hand, and Miss Kitty the tabaxi, dressed to impress in her favorite corset and boots, and looking to kill as indicated by her primed and loaded tommy gun. As she entered the room, Kitty made a point of kicking the dead guard in the two-pump gun. I tutted and said, "Your new friend a bit of a letdown there, sugar?"

Kitty hissed indignantly. "Sumbitch lasted three minutes and wouldn't even put on the damn collar."

"Well, that ain't no way to treat a woman of class." I gently walked my hand along Kitty's shoulder and said, "Seems that once again, it falls to me to pick up the slack when we're done."

"The operative term being when we're done," Saguaro interjected. "We have a job to do."

"Ah, quit your bellyaching, Saguaro." I pulled my twin wands out of my holsters as I added, "Vanity the Vicious always keeps track of the job. Now, let's raise some hell."

With that, the five of us started cutting a bloody trail to the front of the train. Between Richard's constructs, Glokk's brute force, and the combined ranged weaponry of me, Miss Kitty, and Saguaro, the guards mustered up about as much resistance as a tumbleweed could against a dust devil. Eventually, we hit the car right before the vault, and encountered the last guard standing: a man with greying mutton chops in armor decorated in Arcadian Polity medals of valor. General Frederick Indras. My stepfather.

I leveled my wands at him and said, "Open the vault for us and we let you get off this train unharmed. Best deal you're getting, Freddie, so I suggest you take it."

Freddie sighed but wouldn't budge. "How long are you going to keep this up, Veruca? All of this senseless killing for the sake of one dragon?"

"Oh, the Polity's always had this coming. Tell me again, what kinda war crimes are those gonna fund?"

"Our war is just, you ignorant child! We are crusaders, marching onward to a future free of the creatures that are blasphemous in the--"

RATTATATTAT!

Freddie fell to the ground screaming, Miss Kitty's volley of bullets having torn through his leg. Glokk then walked over and took the key to the vault off of Freddie's body as he carried him to the previous car. Before Glokk dumped him, I called out, "And for the record, Freddie, that dragon was a better daddy to me than you could ever dream of being."

As Saguaro detached the car from the rest of the train, I let out a shrill whistle. I heard our dragons swoop down and land on top of the train car. As my crew braced themselves, the vault was lifted into the air and carried off to our hideout.