The God of Leave Me Alone

Eons past I roamed the four corners of this world enjoying its wonders while keeping my own counsel. Then man came. Sensing my power they gathered around me begging for help against wild beasts and wilder men. They called me Great Spirit. And the begging! Ugh! The begging! Save us from wild beasts, Great Spirit! Save us from the Death Mammoth tribe, Great Spirit! This was tiresome to me. There were others like me who would gladly bask in this worship and they could have it. So I left.

I went to a far away land and built shelter for myself. They found me. They came in droves begging for help. My house became their temple. The first ones who got here became their priests. They were go between for me and the people. And the people came. Day after day after day! Please give me justice! Please I want glory! Make me desirable to the world! Despite the priesthood, I felt crowded. So again I took my leave.

This time I decided to live a nomadic lifestyle. Come and go as I pleased. You would think going on random trails man won’t find you, but no! I turn around and here they come! How did they even find me? They didn’t refer to me as Spirit now, just looked up to me like Gilgamesh and Arjuna, mighty ones of fame. Please deliver us from the Evil King! Please save us from the Dark Pact! Beg, beg, beg! Why me? At least they don’t pray to me like their ancestors did! I made sure to stamp out general knowledge of me. Tired of all that whining in my head.

Ages came and they went. Tribes turn to villages, villages turn to towns, towns turn to provinces, provinces turn to nations. Man started to flourish & look to their science as their God now. You would think they would not want to be around me, but here I am giving directions to the next umpteenth person where the hottest new club is, how to get to the zoo, hey, can you watch my bike while I take a selfie? And they still give me offerings! I have need for nothing but they look upon me with pity then give me food & money! This is unbelievable! I think I should go to the Moon. Man doesn’t live there!