I'm the God of Time.

I reverse time every time someone makes an invention, and take credit for it instead.

The other Gods have taken quite a liking in me, so have the humans, yet they all thing that I am the God of the mind, when I'm pretty dumb in reality, I'm not even the one who thought of the fact that I could steal inventions to finally be perceived as an equal by my fellow Gods,

In all reality of the situation, I'm just a homeless thief...

It doesn't really make sense, does it? I mean... How could I be homeless if I'm a thief with a 100% rate of success?

Well... that's a good question, the truth is that-

"Hey, are you okay?" I looked up, for the fifth time of my day, having been disturbed out of my line of thought for no apparent reason by worried humans.

"Yeah dude, you look pretty roughed up, do you want some food, or a ride to the hospital?" ... Huh?

"Oh c'mon guys let's just leave him, he's probably just a depressed drunk anyway" This fuckıng assh-

"Dude! You can't just talk about homeless people like that! He must be really struggling to be looking this bad! Don't you have any empathy?!" Defended the human that first talked.

I mean... I know I look bad but I didn't think I looked THAT bad...

"Yeah, yeah, whatever" answered the, apperantly mean human, with a roll of his eyes.

The humans -minus the mean one- looked at me, waiting for a response, as the mean one sulked in the backround, and that's when I decided that I should probably say something.

"I am not a man no home, nor am I a drunk, and I have enough food to last for a while" I answered with a forced smile, I haven't talked with any humans in a while, so I hope they haven't changed their languages to much-

The mean man snorted, "I don't see you denying that being depressed" ... I don't know what that is-

"Stop being an asshole" said another human, elbowing the human, stiffling a snort of her own. While cutting my line of thought, again, might I add...

"Like you're any better" "See, this is why mom hates you" "And this is why you're no better asshole than me" "At least you admit to being an asshole" "Just wanted to be like you sis" "You must've evolved somewhere along the way, then"

And that's when I decided to cut into this conversation, cause seriously, I know I don't look as good as I used to, but I'm not depressed, whatever that is. "Look, I know you are trying to help, but I am alright, and I am in no need of a healer" All the humans turned to look at me weirdly, and the only one that had yet to speak, spoke, "Dude, I dunno if you've noticed or no', but ya have a bullet hole in ya right leg"

At that, I looked down, I got a little dizzy, and before I could pass out, I turned back time by 3 hours in a state of panic, and coughed blood from using the last remains of my powers once again, before I fell down with a thud.