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Xavier_Kenshi t1_j93m7wk wrote

Reply to comment by evsaadag in [WP] God, demigod, guardian--Every time mankind finds you, during a different age, they give you a title representative of your otherworldly power. You aren't getting weaker, yet your title gets diluted each time until finally, a group of humans think you're just a homeless person who needs help. by gymleader_michael

I'll second this.

The premise is there: the humans are disrespecting the god;

The develop too: the god warns the humans of his power, but they continue advancing calling him mad...

But than the end doesn't proceed to nothing. This make me remember about Dracula: >! there is a HUGE build up, until the main character disappear making a floop in the rhythm !<. Your story should to constantly build up tension, or at least remain tense, up to a big resolution.

Just teleporting them away avoid the conflict, and all that build up accumulated is vanished.

Also, very good job building tension is such a short paragraph! And dialogue feels good too (wich I don't know how much a compliment is since I'm not good at them. So again! You've done good dialogue!)

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