Successful_Craft3076 t1_j9vcaug wrote
"Yes lord dragon sir!" The mayor said. "We agree to your terms effective immediately." He was a short gnome, and by this I mean a gnome who is considered short among other gnomes.
The dragon looked around suspiciously. It was too easy. Since when people surrender to 100 feet long fire breathing flying lizard without few arrows and shouts?
He was deep in his thoughts when he realized he is surrounded by hundreds of town folks. "What is this? An ambush! I see, so you choose to fight at last. Stupid but honorable choice! So be it!"
One of the people, an elder, replied fast: no my lord. We brought you presents!
Dragon's eyes became ten times wider. "What? Presents?"
Yes! Elder answered. "There are cows, sheep, a few barns full of food, and even (a young beautiful elven girl came forward holding a lute) our most talented bard!"
"but...oh...wha..." The dragon was mumbling when the mayor interrupted him: lord dragon sir! Can you sign this treaty? It is just a formality!
"Okay. Tell me what's going on before I set this whole place on fire!!" "Well lord dragon sir..." Mayor started: "around a year ago this young man came to our beautiful little town. A real scum. He kept drinking in a bar for three days straight. Then refused to pay or leave. We sent guards to arrest him but he annihilated every single one of them. We hired mercenaries, assassins, even giants, but he kept beating them up. No one can match him. What a scum. "
"What is has to do with me?" Dragon asked.
Well (mayor was hesitant to say.) We thought maybe you lord dragon sir, surely you can defeat this criminal and restore the rule of law. We are begging you sir. Be the our ruller!!
Sure this tiny mortal could not match his might. dragon thought. And it felt like the mayor was telling the truth. "okay, where is this criminal. I will bring him to justice!"
He is still at the inn drinking. Just south of the town. You can't miss the building. Look for someone called Dovahkiin!
Kaymazo OP t1_j9vd8yl wrote
The important question, how many cheese wheels does Dovahkiin have in his inventory?
bleepblooplord2 t1_j9vdmbb wrote
All the cheese wheels.
All of them.
Successful_Craft3076 t1_j9vfc39 wrote
I dunno about cheese. But I have a feeling he kept one of each booze he found.
Kaymazo OP t1_j9vfo2w wrote
Well that just restores stamina at cost of the natural regeneration rate, not health.
Shileka t1_j9xtcsq wrote
Take the amount of cheese wheels you reasonably believe may fit in someone's pockets, add 7, multiply by 13, add str bonus
The-Name-is-my-Name t1_j9x87qk wrote
Yes, and he’s well-versed in the novel branch of magical spell-casters that is “cheese magic”
rain-blocker t1_j9vtrv4 wrote
"nevermind, I'm off to the next continent"
Successful_Craft3076 t1_j9vx2ys wrote
"Dovahkiin you said?" And he shouted "WULD NAH KEST! " the mayor had seen many dragons flying in these past years, but never like this. Before he could finish saying the P of "please wait", the dragon took off and disappeared into the horizon.
Endulos t1_j9wj4vl wrote
I completely expected that twist but it still took me off guard.
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