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Izrael-the-ancient t1_j998phq wrote

Destructor was one of the most powerful villains on the planet. He always entered a room with his spear that could slash through mountains , and armor that could tank supernovas . No one had ever really bothered to ask though, how powerful is he without that armor . No one except me .

I dared to ask , what is he without that armor.

When he landed on my house , crushing it beneath his feet. I decided to test my theory . See , I used to go hunting with my dad . I was really good in fact. I was So good he nicknamed me “oneshot “ because I was patient enough to wait for the single perfect shot.

That’s what I did here too. I waited till destructor broke out again. As per usual no one could really harm him. Heroes like Medusa with her eye blast or the woodsman with his Axe couldn’t even break his armor . It took them three hours until they finally managed to hang up on him . In the end it wasn’t some kind of super powered finisher that beat him. It was a stupid dog pile .

If it had ended here I would’ve just let him get dragged off to jail . However while the cops cuffed him and put him in the van. Destructor pushed a cop down and grabbed his spear . You could see the look of horror on every officers and heroes face. It took all their power to beat him the first time. But this was too soon. There was no time to relax , no time to breath , no time heal , no time to - BANG!

A single shot rang out . I didn’t even look back at my target. I knew I hadn’t missed . It was the perfect shot . Right through the throat and out the base of the neck. I didn’t use any special ammo. Just a single high caliber round . I didn’t even bother with a silencer .

The surprising thing was the fact the heroes were too shocked to respond. Warpspeed is fast enough to create speed portal behind her , yet she didn’t even move to my location. It’s not even as if they couldn’t find me. the chronicler’s ability to map any location meant that I should’ve been caught instantly .

Yet nothing. I took apart my rifle , cleaned up my hiding spot and walked away . In the news the next morning they said a rookie cop took the shot . They said he had no choice . This was apparently a better alternative than “mysterious sniper”. Which in my humble opinion I’m fine with.

To be completely honest . No one would know it was me if it wasn’t for the fact that the the Phantom Order put a bounty in my head . Now I have to defend myself . Last time I killed it was revenge . This time it’s self defense .

Although , rigging the family farm to burst into uncontrollable flames all while mowing down anyone who gets close with a shot gun, doesn’t seem like self defense. However my lawyer says that the people I killed were trained assassins. I had no choice.

Anyway, I’m posting this here on the hero helpline message board to ask for asistance . Is there any way to take out robots without super strength . I know that an emp works but if I did that I’d fry the power for the entire city. Is there like a trick to beating these things. Because shooting them isn’t really effective.

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BackflipBuddha t1_j9aocrs wrote

Ok, so, if the robots aren’t shielded from EMP (and that’s just shoddy workmanship there) then a sufficiently suped up taser might do the trick. Now, depending on where you live it might not be legal to do that, so check your local ordinances. Also, you can tailor an EMP’s effective range. Might not get all the bots, but that’s why you make multiple. Failing that, you’ll need armor Piercing rounds, which aren’t legal anywhere really. Or just a really high caliber.

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TheFinalDawnYT t1_j9bw75p wrote

Beef up the taser, of course, but make the darts longer range. Those murderbots likely have better senses than you, and quite a bit more range given they probably have some ranged weaponry.

You could also augment one of your rifles to shoot the darts (with a much longer and stronger cord) and hook the thing up to, like, a car battery.

Not a lawyer though, make sure that's remotely legal as a self defense option. Probably isn't, but worth checking.

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Atreigas t1_j9cjhng wrote

I think legal is his last worry nowadays.

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Izrael-the-ancient t1_j9cd27l wrote

Update :

Thank you all for the support and suggestions. I have decided to go with heavy duty magnets and a homemade electrified mud fields . It took me an entire week to build it but it worked .

Turns out , the robots that were sent out to kill me were designed to be spammed . Meaning they’re durable but not unbreakable . So when the first wave went through the muddy fields to get to my house , they were really vulnerable . Did you know that mud conducts electricity really well. Especially if you salt the earth with iron shavings beforehand .

The first wave went down almost immediately. When the second wave coming in a day later I was pleasantly surprised the electric current was still good despite the bodies of fifty robots covering the ground. Who ever designed these things must not have insulated them. The second wave dropped just as fast as the first.

As for the magnets , I never actually had to use them. I’ve been using the magnets and a log winches to move the robot bodies into a perimeter. So far nothings made it through. I think the third wave will be coming tomorrow . Although from what I read , the villain who sent them , Techiton, usually uses nanites to repurpose the corpses of its robot army. I doubt he has much more material for robots .

If I manage to beat him , that leaves me with only three more members of the phantom order left to come after me.

For those who don’t know the phantom order. Consists of :

Techiton : digital consciousness of a scum bag millionaire with an army

The red nurse : nurse with the ability to manipulate blood.

Horror : rumored to be an unfathomable eldritch beast from beyond . Usually just a petty theif

Replica : able to clone herself and others via materials near by . Clones only follow rudimentary orders ( deceased , I think she died when I set my farm field ablaze )

Sin: fake priest with the ability to amplify one of the seven cardinal sins in a person.

Destructor : functionally immortal battle addicted warrior with invulnerable armor , and the cursed spear drains the lifespan of its wielder to increase its strength ( deceased , read first post )

If Techiton and replica are defeated , the phantom order would have no army. So the dark trinity would have to kill me themselves . Plus it would mean I’ve killed three of the six members .

Wish me luck

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Aphrel86 t1_j9emfpj wrote

Im thinking defense is the hard way to go about it. You will always be fighting enemies on their terms, when they are ready.

What you should do is fake your own death or go into hiding, then go on the hunt. Get them on your terms and when they arent ready for it.

If you are in a fair fight, you didn't plan it properly!

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Izrael-the-ancient t1_j9ghps2 wrote

Update 2:

Sorry for the long wait . Turns out I was wrong Techiton has a near infinite army. However thanks to his ego I beat him.

You see , Techiton is many things but he’s still an egotistical rich guy . The fact that I , some random guy living out in the middle of no where , was beating his robot army . This was an insult he couldn’t stand . So he came to my house personally with an army much larger than before . Once again the army marched . And once again . The muddy electric field wiped them out. Only this time , they kept coming.

They actually were walking on the corpses of their fallen robots. I would’ve been screwed if a commenter hadn’t suggested I go on the offensive . While I didn’t fake my death like they suggested . I did however default to my favorite solution . SCORCHED EARTH POLICY.

I rigged every single robot to explode . Of course an explosion this big destroyed the farm house leaving a crater . But I wasn’t in the house . I was under it in the bomb shelter my uncle built. He’s a doomsday prepper so it could survive a nuke , an alien invasion, a zombie outbreak , and a third magical war.

Unfortunately for me , techiton made his body the most durable . He was the only robot left and I was out of tricks . He hacked the bomb shelter door and marched right in like he owned the place .

I thought I was a goner until I remembered the shelter was a Faraday cage . While he was monologing about how “this was the end” and “no one insults the phantom order” and “you’ve cost me millions” you know , typical supervillain garbage . I shuffled slowly to the lever and activated the cage .

He noticed it Immediately but only said “You think blocking the signal will stop me . I’ll just simply kill you and then walk until I get signal “

And he’s right he could just kill me and leave . If By turning on the faraday cage I hadn’t also activated the manual mode for the doors. Now the only way to get out was for me to enter the code. I had essentially trapped techiton here .

We actually sat in the bunker for a week. I was content eating food and reading books . While techiton kept trying to force open the door. Apparently it was “beneath him “ to use torture . But in all honesty I think he’s just a germaphobe . Since when I cut my hand he freaked out . Speaking of , that’s actually how I beat him.

It was gross but I just dumped the indoor sewage tank on his head . I didn’t actually destroy him with that but he immediately freaked out. Techiton was Running around like a chicken with its head cut off. Eventually he ditched his body and uploaded himself into my laptop . This was his big mistake .

I’m an anime fan and like most anime fans I may or may not…. Watch anime illegally. Every fan knows that those illegal sites host some of the best anime BUT ALSO THE BEST VIRUSES . Since we were in a faraday cage he had no way out. He had hopped into the only machine capable of storing his consciousness. I don’t know what the virus did but it fried him and the laptop itself .

Literally fried , it started smoking and caught fire .

I’m actually typing this story on a computer at the library . I figured it was best to leave his smoldering remains trapped in a faraday cage . I plan on paying a company to fill the entire place with concrete. So that way even if he’s alive , techiton will never see the sun again.

The downside of this is now I’m homeless, and the phantom order is after me. I think the next one to come is Horror and then the red nurse and sin . Which is why I’m at a library . Apparently from what everyone has learned about horror . It has a connection to knowledge . So by hiding in a library I’m protected from its wrath .

Once again , wish me luck

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Aphrel86 t1_j9inmk5 wrote

My condolences for losing your anime collection, that mustve hurt.

But atleast you are safe now. You can live to collect new glorious animes another day!

If the gods are merciful, you might be able to earn a good buck trying to sell off what scraps remain of the robot army to fund your collection? :D

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Izrael-the-ancient t1_j9krbwx wrote

Update 3 :

Sorry for not posting for a year. Unfortunately for me I was completely wrong about Horror and it’s connections to knowledge.

It turns out horror , is directly connected to fiction itself . Horror or as she used to be called Thalia , is one of the original Greek muses. Over the years as humanity lost faith in the Greek gods . The muses grew stronger as creativity and knowledge took precedence. She is now the goddess of fiction , or more specifically IMAGINATION.

Needless to say me hiding in a library of all places was bad. I wanna say about five seconds after I posted that last update I was captured . I actually spent the last year being tossed between all her favorite books . Some times I got horror story , some times I got a romance novel, but mostly she trapped me in a bunch of manga . Did you know that any manga can be an isekai if throw in a random civilian.

I lost count of the amount of books I was teleported through after I ran out of mecha manga . The only reason I’m alive right now is that she doesn’t allow herself to know every story written. Every time she dropped me into a manga , I used my knowledge of how manga stories work and broke the story. After all, if I ruin the ending the story ends quicker . This infuriated her into releasing me .

My release however came with a few conditions :

#1 I have to get the words “PROPERTY OF THALIA” tattooed somewhere embarrassing. I’m currently typing this while laying on my stomach so you can guess what I did.

#2 I have to continue to type out these updates . She also said that depending on if people like this . I have to make my own separate blog.

#3 I can not work for any of the other Old ones . The old ones refer to ancient dirties or spirits who humanity has forgotten about or stopped worshipping in mass. From what she said , a few of the heroes are servants of or are secretly old ones. So that’s just great .

#4 I can’t spoil any more books , manga , tv shows , or cartoons for her . This one was the biggest since she said an entire genre of anime. This is only because I told her that all isekai follow the same format. WHICH THEY DO !

5 if I violate any of her conditions she will turn me into a childrens book and leave me in a day care . Given how horribly kids treat books. I accepted her offer but not without making my own conditions .

I asked for her to restore my family farm and house , immortality , and super powers . She gave me the family farm and then made me functionally immortal but only if I keep writing . This basically means I’ll live forever but I can still be killed or get sick . I just won’t die of old age .

So that’s my life now. I didn’t actually defeat Horror , but instead I annoyed her into making me a prisoner . I’m not entirely sure if I won here . She’s still a thief so I didn’t even stop her . I tried suggesting that maybe she’d have more fun as a hero . She countered by reminding me of the heroes journey and how it typically ends . Given she thinks I’m on a heroes journey myself I feel like that was a warning.

Thanks to Thalia releasing me I missed out on a lot. Apparently the heroes surge and and argonaut have been fused together by magic to create StormWalker ! Also villain known as microbe shrank Mount Everest ? I missed out on some weird stuff . Hopefully I didn’t miss too much.

Once again wish me luck . Especially since now that I’m functionally immortal red nurse and Sin are once again coming after me.

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