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RagdollEnthusiast t1_iu99mug wrote

Reply to comment by DeaddyRuxpin in A girl leaving her boyfriend for a guy with a bigger dick is the same as a guy leaving his girlfriend for one with bigger boobs. by [deleted]

You must be very young.

Of course there are shitty reasons to end a relationship. I don't think you realize that something can be equally shitty and perfectly fine to do. Not everything we do is going to be sunshine and roses, but our own personal happiness is more important than anyone else's. So yes, you can dump someone for any reason, but that doesn't make it not shitty. Just like if you're married to someone for 20 years and they are involved in an accident that covers their entire face in burns, rendering them hideous. If you then leave them because you do not find them attractive anymore due to burns they cannot control, that is an incredibly shitty thing to do, but yes you can still do it if you aren't happy with an ugly partner.

You don't just get to shrug off any and all guilt because "muh happiness". If you're gonna be that shallow and dump someone for superficial reasons, then accept that it's shitty and move on.

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Mai_man t1_iu9bkka wrote

You do get to just shrug it off. You are not responsible for anybody's happiness. If you are unhappy, move on. The fact that a person's is making the choice to move on and not drag out a situation that will spiral into miserable existence means they made a good choice. Maybe you're the one who "must be very young" and by young, I mean lacking in experience. Because after a point, your age number correlates much less with life experience.

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UntrueOmara t1_iu9cb8q wrote

you are literally saying you should be unhappy in a relationship if its due to something they cant control? do i have that right?

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Pandamonium-23 t1_iu9dvg9 wrote

No, you’re misunderstanding the point op is making. If someone is unhappy in a relationship then they should leave regardless, op never even mentioned this tho. You’re assuming the person is unhappy with current boob or dick size when that’s not what they said

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UntrueOmara t1_iu9e7g0 wrote

if they are unhappy in a relationship due to a factor neither party can control then you should stay in it. thats literally the argument. sure its superficial to leave due to a factor like dick size. but are you really expected to spend the rest of your life dissatisfied?

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RagdollEnthusiast t1_iu9ea9a wrote

Man it's like you read the entire comment and didn't actually comprehend any of it, lol. Do I have that right?

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Fleaslayer t1_iu9iwfb wrote

>You must be very young.

I'm 60 and that was my first assumption about you. I agree with the other person: you should never feel obligated to be in a relationship that doesn't make you happy, with the caveat that if you get married, you're making a commitment.

As far as dating or gf/bf go though, the more immature thing is to feel like you have to stay with someone when you aren't happy, regardless of what it is that is making you unhappy.

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RagdollEnthusiast t1_iuhu5mp wrote

I'm sorry, that as very rude. Allow me to rephrase.

I completely agree with you, and always have. I never said you should stay with these people. If you are truly unhappy, always leave. There are few reasons good enough to stay with someone you are superficially unhappy with. My argument stems from a discussion I had with my wife and best friend. Often time, women brush off leaving a man for another man just because he has a larger penis as play and as if it does not hurt the man being left, or they callously believe it does not matter if they hurt his feelings. Yet simultaneously, it appears that when a man leaves a woman because the woman has larger beasts, it's a crime and they can never believe someone would do this. My point was that both superficial reasons for leaving someone are awful, not that it should not be done. It seems many are unable to separate something being shitty and something being wrong. Just because it's awful doesn't make it wrong. Many seem to want to see everything they do in a positive light and that is just not the case here.

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RagdollEnthusiast t1_iuhoiyd wrote

Then you definitely do not show your age with your wisdom or reading comprehension.

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DeaddyRuxpin t1_iu9j4rl wrote

You missed the entire point of what I said. Let’s start with you can throw any reason or example you want out there and my point will remain because it isn’t about the reason, it is about being unhappy in a relationship to the point you want to end it. If you are at that point, regardless if it is because your partner has started raping and eating babies or because your partner cut their hair in a way that bothers you, if you have reached a point where you are unhappy enough to want to end the relationship then you should end it. The alternative is to stick it out and be let your resentment and anger grow and fester and make both your and their lives miserable until you inevitably end it anyway or one of you dies.

Does any of the above mean your partner decided to microwave fish and now you are annoyed the house smells like fish so you should break up? No, not even close. Because, and I’ll say this again because you totally missed it, it has nothing whatsoever to do with the reason and everything to do with no longer wanting to be in a relationship with that person.

There are no shitty reasons to end a relationship, there are just shitty relationships that should have been ended but weren’t because someone was told there are shitty reasons so now they hate every day of their life stuck in a relationship that doesn’t make them happy.

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