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Impressive_Friend740 t1_j64ezy8 wrote

What part of pa are your parents in? I’m sorry for the loss of your brother. One option that might be a bit cheaper than meal plans is to have your caregiver make a bunch of meals that could be frozen and then popped in the oven when they are ready. I’m not sure how mobile your parents are. Hopefully you get some good advice here.

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star_tyger OP t1_j64h1gu wrote

Thank you. My parents are in the Poconos, in Monroe County.

I don't know if we can find a caregiver to do that.

I thought of premaking frozen meals. Between myself, my daughter and my niece, one of us will be here once a month to take care of whatever we can, to touch base and make sure they know they're loved and supported. We could get them a freezer and make meals ourselves. My father is fighting me over the idea. "I don't need you to do that!" Sigh. I'm also concerned that we may only be able to be here for a day or two and that's a lot to do. My husband and I can also help with the cost of delivered meals. If my father will let us. His stubbornness is getting worse.

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RedEyed_BrainFried t1_j65ee4y wrote

You would want to contact the Monroe County Area Agency on Aging. They work with older adults and will assign your parents a caseworker who can assist them with getting services such as setting them up with the local meals on wheels and possibly other services depending on their earnings because of our states rules. Here is the number for their office: 570-420-3735. I hope this helps in anyway and best of luck in your situation.

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Impressive_Friend740 t1_j64huv9 wrote

My sister has a lake house in lake Ariel and I know there are lots of communities in the whole poconos area so perhaps if you’re on fb you could find one near your parents and see if anyone needs part time work? Im glad all your family will be pitching in that will be helpful. And i get the stubborness thing my dad is in his mid 60s and already on the stubborn kick. The loss of independence is hard. You can maybe say your friend sold u the freezer at a good rate?

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susinpgh t1_j65iy3a wrote

Elders can be protective of their independence. I'm not sure which is harder; one that won't accept hep, or one that expects you to drop everything and wait on them hand and foot. (My mom was the latter.)

There are some caregiver subreddits that may help you figure out the best way to get your parents to accept help. The techniques that seem to work the best are the ones when they come up with the idea on their own. But this requires quite a bit of finesse. Also, they might grumble, but I guarantee they are secretly grateful.

Can they do any kind of face-to-face time? There are a lot of options and you may be able to get a fairly automated protocol set up so that you can keep contact regularly.

Best wishes to you.

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