You need to grow the fuck up. Get a therapist, talk to your doctor. Do whatever it takes to get a hold of your life. You are almost 30 years for fuck's sake. Enough of this I don't believe in myself bullshit. I know life isn't easy, but you need an attitude adjustment. You're a grown up now act like it. Exercise, healthy eating, healthy habits, talk with a therapist. C'mon! You can do it!