Submitted by Potential_Meringue_6 t3_11avv9t in LifeProTips

A lot of times people will have a thought that gets their ego riled up, but that doesn't mean you have act on that thought and yell at someone. Take a breath, let the thought wash through you and then give yourself 4 seconds to look for alternative reactions. Over time it will get easier and you will have less friction in your life.

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dirkedgently42 t1_j9umgps wrote

“Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.” - Viktor Frankl

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Lithogiraffe t1_j9v9u1i wrote

Completely disagree. I've attended The Thanksgiving of someone I absolutely hated, but she was a co-worker. I even bought the pie and a side. That wasn't me. That was the situation I was in. I really really disliked her.

And I'm pretty sure she was stuck in a similar situation, and why she had to invite me also.

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Lithogiraffe t1_j9vae14 wrote

Okay, I read the title paragraph, and wrote out a comment before reading the post body. So my reply is not quite what is being discussed. I completely disagree with the title, but generally agree with the post body. The read individually they seem to be discussing different things

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IveGotDMunchies t1_j9vhen8 wrote

Dunno what you're talking about but let's pass this joint.

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Lithogiraffe t1_j9vj4rw wrote

Pass it?

Definitely not going to listen to that voice in my head

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marybeemarybee t1_j9ul25r wrote

The thoughts often come from deeply held beliefs.

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some-key t1_j9v8ttx wrote

That's the automatic thoughts, internalized beliefs. Some come from beliefs that you consciously hold and others from what you have taken in from your environment and culture.

It's really interesting to identify these, you learn a lot about yourself.

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Magic_mousie t1_j9xyhlr wrote

I have automatic thoughts that horrify me sometimes after growing up in a strongly conservative area. I just hope, like OP says, that the fact my conscious self recoils from them and would never act on them means I'm better than that.

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some-key t1_j9zmxx7 wrote

Absolutely, what you decide to act on is what defines you. It's not uncommon to internalize the logic that was used to attack you or that stands against what you are. I think it's a kind of defense mechanism, and once you are self aware enough to notice it you no longer need it. Then you can work to let it go by not engaging and consciously breaking the pattern of those thoughts.

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socalmikester t1_j9w0ia4 wrote

whats weird is that some people dont have those voices. my brains always telling me i need to get crap done, but my body is like "nah"

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keepthetips t1_j9ub8dt wrote

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DadToOne t1_j9ujg9d wrote

I think therefore I am.

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muskratboy t1_j9unlu3 wrote

Or, just because you think something doesn’t mean it’s true.

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m945050 t1_ja0pqpi wrote

What a convenient defense.

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ChrisGeritol t1_j9ubxrm wrote

If you're hearing voices in your head, seek professional help.

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socalmikester t1_j9w0t1u wrote

its normal for people to have an inner dialogue. do you not have one?

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ChrisGeritol t1_j9w1olk wrote

I don't hear voices, no.

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goofypugs t1_j9xr603 wrote

it’s not voices, it’s you going over potential options/thoughts/etc

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Arkonicc t1_j9un0l6 wrote

And especially if you hear them outside of your head when you are alone

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