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8urfiat t1_jcqdcus wrote

Don’t go in hot. Cool off first. You will react much better when you’re not as upset.

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Mission_Willow_3309 t1_jcqofe0 wrote

This. Life lesson.

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Green-Salmon t1_jcrinda wrote

Very important lesson if the person usually does that. Op’s tip is for people who never do that.

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mrsmushroom t1_jcro2el wrote

Life lesson I'm sure we've all learned at least once. Some of us, more times.

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bisforbenis t1_jcr05dz wrote

People can be bothered by a thing without “going in hot”. Having your feelings get hurt but being emotionally mature means you can call it out without rage or impulsivity being in play

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GypsyBagelhands t1_jcr2pw8 wrote

In many cases hormones can get in the way of calling things out without rage. Being emotionally mature means having the presence of mind to know you need to take a minute to cool down and figure out how to articulate your feelings in a calm and collected manner.

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Neat_Art9336 t1_jcroues wrote

Exactly. You can also do both. “We’ll talk about this later, but know I am upset by this.”

A lot of times it doesn’t make sense to bring it up later. “Hey, this thing you did yesterday upsets me.” And the other person will be like, “I don’t remember?” They’re going to think of you as emotionally immature or unpredictable.

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afreiden t1_jcrio3v wrote

Exactly. The OP's description is too vague to comment on their particular situation but being a slave to your feelings and impulsively telling others to go f**k themselves is generally bad advice.

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PetiteMeatPete t1_jcrinhq wrote

The real LPT.

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Dutty_Mayne t1_jcrjtsm wrote

It's a balance. You should make it known as early as possible without being overly emotional.

Depending on the person that could be a couple seconds or a couple days.

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FZeroT t1_jcrkp7j wrote

Yeah definitely use words before smacking someone at the Oscars or something like that

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soaper410 t1_jcroh21 wrote

Soemtimes it can take a while to process and figure out how you feel or why you feel that way.

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bahamapapa817 t1_jcro9oo wrote

This is true. Even if they deserve a go fuck yourself going in cool and rational garners much better results.

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