The Story of Jack Schitt

Awe Schitt, the fertilizer magnate, married Oh Schitt, the owner of the Kneedeep Schitt Inc. They had one son named Jack.

Jack Schitt married Noe Schitt, and they produced six children. Their first daughter, Holy Schitt, passed away shortly after birth. Next came twin sons, Deep Schitt and Dip Schitt. Followed by twin daughters, Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt. Finally, there was another son, Bull Schitt.

Deep Schitt married Dumb Schitt, an elementary school dropout. They didn't have any children. Dip Schitt married Lotta Schitt, and they have a son named Chicken Schitt. Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt married the Happens brothers. The Schitt-Happens children are named Dawg Schitt, Byrd Schitt, and Horace Schitt.

Bull Schitt just married an Italian bride named Pisa Schitt. They are currently awaiting the arrival of Baby Schitt.

After many years of marriage, Noe Schitt divorced Jack. She kept the Schitt family name because of her children. Noe recently remarried, and her new husband's name is John Sherlock. So her name is now Noe Schitt-Sherlock.

Now, when anyone tells you that you don't know Jack Schitt, you can pass this story on to them.