Submitted by AdeptLengthiness8886 t3_10l5xa8 in Jokes
Macca49 t1_j5wvef0 wrote
Best one was from Jay And Silent Bob Strike Back when the hitchhiker gets in the truck lol
dje1964 t1_j5wzqwp wrote
George Carlin
"If it gets me a few miles down the road, I'll take a shot in the mouth"
BillyMackBlack t1_j5xj11q wrote
"Gay, straight, it's all the same these days"
dje1964 t1_j5y88se wrote
I think the gay community has a lot of fun
I just can't get past the "Sex with men" thing
I have to draw the line somewhere
Edit:. So I get down voted because I don't want to have sex with men. I didn't say you couldn't. Just expressing my personal preference
But I guess that isn't allowed anymore
dingbust_toteypooh t1_j5ytym1 wrote
Absolutely…..that’s because “what was once called evil, is now called good…and what was once called good…is now called evil”.
Sleepycoon t1_j5zaz1l wrote
The amount of conjecture in the replies to this based solely off of a few downvotes is hilarious.
Maybe the far left mob isn't coming after you for being straight; maybe a few people just didn't get your joke, or got it but didn't think it was funny?
ApatheticZero187 t1_j5yjg5q wrote
I being male and having an interest in vagina can also attest to the fact that getting down voted for enjoying the company of the opposite sex is apparently the way things are handled now. Soon straightness will be a crime.
dje1964 t1_j5yldz1 wrote
So back in the late 70's and early 80's when I was a strong supporter of equal rights for all and the Democrat party still didn't want any part of gays I was considered part of the "Looney Left".
Now, because I don't want to have sex with someone with a dick, I am considered a homophobic right winger
Funny thing is, nothing about my political philosophy has changed
ApatheticZero187 t1_j5zdl6c wrote
Oh what a strange world we live in. Growing up, I couldn't care one way or the other what some ones preference was. I just figured that if guys were into guys, that left more women for guys like me who liked women. Then one night while I was at a dance club jamming to some techno, the girl I was dancing with ask me what my preference was. I said I was into women and she responded... "Me too"... still not sure where that was headed as she vanished not too long after that.... hmmm
dje1964 t1_j60i7q2 wrote
I am the lead bouncer at a gay club. Get along great with the owners as well as many of the drag queens
I get invited to many events as a guest instead as a bouncer. Problem is there is a small minority that won't accept boundaries. This is not a hit on gays it is a hit on guys. I see the same thing on ladies nights. Guys come in there and think they can hit on lesbians when the girls come there specifically to avoid people like that. When I pull them out for not respecting boundaries they almost always say the same thing
"You must be gay"
"Maybe, do you really want to go home and tell your friends you got your ass kicked by a f****t"
HopPros t1_j5zglsk wrote
Yes losing a few fake internet points definitely makes you a victim on par with the hundreds of years of queer people being murdered for their sexuality. So sorry for your loss
ApatheticZero187 t1_j61avk4 wrote
And you should presume to know my life and what I've been through so as to pin that on me? You can blame me for being straight because obviously I was single handedly the source of all of it. May as well blame me for the mass slaughter of native Americans when the white man moved west. I was plotting that and traveled back in time to commit these atrocities. Behold my awesomeness as a super villain who is into females...
Evil_Creamsicle t1_j5z9wb7 wrote
Yeah people (as in, like, the human collective) like to overcorrect.
"THese people were discriminated against for a while, that's super awful!"
'yes, I agree. Let's treat everyone equally.'
"Nooooo we have to discriminate against these other people now!"
apageofthedarkhold t1_j5y2nf9 wrote
Don't be so suburban...
Evil_Creamsicle t1_j5z9jk4 wrote
"There's no more lines!"
*points at yellow line in street*
"Well right there's a line, and on this side, we ain't gay!"
YesFuture2022 t1_j5xtu2v wrote
What is it?
northwoods74 t1_j5y3yrj wrote
A 2001 Kevin Smith movie, but that’s not important right now.
Maynard078 t1_j5yaib3 wrote
Surely you can't be serious.
CKBear t1_j5yfmhx wrote
I am serious, and don’t call me Shirley
Maynard078 t1_j638itu wrote
::sheepishly backs away and closes cockpit door::
pulstar13 t1_j61r65t wrote
"It's a White Hole"
YesFuture2022 t1_j62p39q wrote
What?
pulstar13 t1_j62to2n wrote
"Well you know how a black hole is black? This is a white hole"
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