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marco-polo-123 t1_j1k810x wrote

It may not be 12 inches, but it sure smells like a foot

Thanks for the upvotes everyone, as well as the award. Let's all try and enjoy the 12 inches, I mean days of Christmas 😅

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MailOrderDog t1_j1kkpcc wrote

If you can't gag her with the size, gag her with the smell!

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Jill_Schitt t1_j1n3vqv wrote

You villain! That’s a crime against humanity!

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Triforcefisher t1_j1kdjsx wrote

That’s the funniest shit I have heard in a minute 😂

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amerkanische_Frosch t1_j1mluwc wrote

Fellow picks up a girl in a bar, takes her home, they kiss, they make out, and one thing leads to another and there they are, in bed, naked.

After some exciting foreplay, the fellow is about to consummate the deed, when the girl moans: "your toe, I want your toe!"

"EH?" the fellow responds.

"Your TOE", screams the girl, "TAKE ME WITH YOUR BIG TOE!"

Ever the gentlemen, the fellow complies.

A couple of days later, the fellow calls the girl on the phone.

"Err...I don't quite know how to tell you this, but I've been diagnosed with syphilis of the big toe."

The girl screams into the phone:

"You think THAT's something? I have ATHLETE'S CUNT!"

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BadExamp13 t1_j1mjkcc wrote

I've got 12 inches...

... Of snow in my yard.

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PowerandSignal t1_j1mw0c5 wrote

I see. How did you measure?

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Jill_Schitt t1_j1n469p wrote

He dug a person-sized hole in the snow until he hit the ground, laid down on the ground, unzipped his fly, and saw that the snow was 3x the length of his erect cock.

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32lib t1_j1nwqks wrote

Measured in cm,called it inches.

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MGM2112 t1_j1m29tt wrote

Omg. Thank you for the HUGE Christmas laugh.😅🤣😂

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tyrone_mcpipe t1_j1md2gx wrote

I damn near rolled off the couch wheezing. Thank you for the laugh, kind internet stranger.

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treev22 t1_j1n66i1 wrote

I heard most of the world goes by the scent-o-meter…

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My_Balls_Itch_123 t1_j1na48g wrote

There's 12 inches of global warming right outside my door that I'm going to have to shovel away.

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lililukea t1_j1nbwfy wrote

Dammit, if I had the money to award this comment

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