The Best Son.

Submitted by tugnasty t3_z5bo5h in Jokes

Three brothers are waiting for their mother at the airport. One says I'm the best son because I got her a new car! The second one says I'm the best son because I got her a new TV!. The third one says I'm the best son because she's lonely so I got her a parrot to talk to.

The mother gets off the plane and goes up to the first one and says I hate the car. Im practically blind and can't drive but now I gotta pay insurance to park it on the street.

She goes to the second son and says I can't see the TV anyway I just listened to the preacher and now I can't figure out how to work this thing.

She goes to the third son and says you're a good boy and always take good care of your mother. The chicken was delicious.

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Comments

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EightFive8ty5 t1_ixv7k91 wrote

Imagine a woman so blind she can’t turn a tv off yet somehow manages to pluck and clean a bird

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fucya1973 t1_ixzbw27 wrote

Who sid she plucked it. Savage old bitch.

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MistraloysiusMithrax t1_ixxnntv wrote

Wow someone has lost their touch

Edit: bet you ain’t never heard of a refrigerator either

Edit 2: all in good fun since you gave me the openings ;)

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boitrubl t1_ixwvv60 wrote

The parrot is supposed to be very rare and very expensive

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ExhibitAa t1_ixvao9s wrote

Might I offer you a few quotation marks?

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David_Patterson t1_ixwb0kr wrote

Probably lost in the cut-and-paste.

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A-purple-bird t1_ixwccob wrote

Copy*

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Iz-kan-reddit t1_ixww2d0 wrote

Cut. That small hole in the internet way over there is where this joke used to be.

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A-purple-bird t1_ixxfpyd wrote

Cool but 'cut' is in text that you can edit. When you cut text, it deletes it and adds it to your clipboard.

Copy is just copying the text to your clipboard

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Lakefish_ t1_ixy23jn wrote

Mmmmmno. OP copied it to a text file, and cut it from there to past here - there WAS prior copying, but you don't cook over a standing tree.

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A-purple-bird t1_ixy6v0d wrote

And how would you know this?

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RoninJak t1_iy4ii4l wrote

I'm getting really sick of reddit lately and it is entirely because of seeing people simply stating facts getting down voted like this. How the fuck does anyone just assume the text was cut. Like, maybe he reposts shit with unnecessary extra steps, but if anyone with 2 brain cells were to repost something without editing it, they would just copy it. Like this whole argument is so fucking stupid and his response to this comment is basically "nuh-uh, it could be, you don't know" and you are the one getting down voted? The comments used to be my favorite part of reddit, and now I can feel them giving me cancer. Sorry for the rant. No one is going to read this far into this stupid chain anyway.

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Lakefish_ t1_ixyoy2e wrote

Examples in hypothetical, of course. You discounted all options, I explained one that was logical

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RoninJak t1_iy4j1hj wrote

Not the fucking question. You are now making an unfounded assumption to back up the use of cut-and-paste as proper.This does nothing but discredit your argument. Is it literally this hard for people to admit they are wrong?

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Lakefish_ t1_iy4k8or wrote

This is an internet debate, not something to get worked up over. I was giving an example where "cut and paste" IS the correct wording, in counterpoint to your assertion that it would ALWAYS be the wrong words to use. This "unfound assumption" is a presumption that I HAVE seen occur, as well.

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A-purple-bird t1_iy5dbsx wrote

No, its not logical. How is copying the post, pasting it into a txt file, cutting the text then pasting it into the post editor fucking logical??

Also, thats not my question

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Lakefish_ t1_iy5gyz5 wrote

It's logical because "I'm copying it from them, but putting MY copy in to post!"

  • so said my great grandparents, and one of my not-great grandparents
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A-purple-bird t1_iy5kyqm wrote

Yeah thats copying it not cutting it lolol

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Lakefish_ t1_iy5nfme wrote

'fraid not. The action preceding the paste into the posting was a cut from a text document. The copying into it WAS a copy, but to post it had been a cut. I don't know WHY the text document was needed, the cut was unnecessary; but it is, for some reason, an important distinction - one that it seems cannot be impressed upon you.

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A-purple-bird t1_iy5rkm1 wrote

You didn't mention cutting the text from a text document in your last comment lol. Also its not logical. Just copy the text from the post and paste it into the post editor.

Next time come up with something that makes sense lol.

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Lakefish_ t1_iy5w1pw wrote

I had.. two? comments ago, actually. And as I've said, one of my grandparents does this. I don't find it sensible, but it HAS happened.

Are.. you sure you should be on reddit?

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A-purple-bird t1_iy5zv1b wrote

Oh shuuuuuut the fuuuuuuck uuuuup

Okay, so your grandparents do it. So?? Its not logical at all, and as such, op most likely didn't do that.

Actually op didn't do that. Op is a bot that is programmed to copy the contents of posts with a lot of updoots from a long time ago and post said contents.

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Lakefish_ t1_iy68eeh wrote

Was just an example that it DOES happen

If OP is a bot though, fair enough

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SupersuMC t1_ixxc6d5 wrote

The poor bird... :'(

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--69--- t1_ixy8npj wrote

How'd she get off the plane and go over to even recognise her son .... Imagine them not being her sons and some psychos seeking out a nearly blind milf.....

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