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Comments
bsteineman t1_isssffz wrote
Did you know that Hellen Keller had a swing set when she was little?
Neither did she.
Middleway_Natural t1_isswtk7 wrote
Lol but she wasn’t mute
Someordinaryguy1994 t1_issyhd4 wrote
A guy walked into a bar. He woke up with a concussion
Nous-erna-me t1_issz2w1 wrote
Lmfuckinao
caffeinex2 t1_isszxbl wrote
A great time to plug https://helenkellersimulator.org/
D3rpb01 t1_ist0ma8 wrote
I don't know what I was expecting
BenjaminHamnett t1_ist2gxu wrote
Too soon
IHkumicho t1_ist3sy2 wrote
Why did Helen Keller's dog run away?
You would too if your name was Arrroughmaromoorrowaughgibt.
Tim-oBedlam t1_ist4ccj wrote
what's the definition of endless love?
Helen Keller and Stevie Wonder playing tennis
plateau1999 t1_ist5mpx wrote
Why can’t Helen Keller drive?
Because she’s a woman.
[deleted] t1_ist61eo wrote
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sittinginaboat t1_ist67ca wrote
They'd rearranged.
FabulousProfessor651 t1_ist6huj wrote
How did Helen Keller burn her face? She answered the iron.
[deleted] t1_ist6y65 wrote
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Playfullyhung t1_ist71fl wrote
elpajaroquemamais t1_ist78cq wrote
Not accurate. She wouldn’t see black. She’d see nothing.
Explains_Wrong t1_ist825n wrote
So she was colorblind. Huh.
Loduwijk t1_ist8i0d wrote
Oh? Are you suggesting she could audibly speak?
gtg965p t1_ist8k41 wrote
That’s some dark humor right there
juankaa t1_ist8uk7 wrote
...exactly what I was expecting.
NoneOfThisIsFine t1_ist9if7 wrote
Punkeewalla t1_ist9ohn wrote
Helen Keller fell off a cliff. She screamed and screamed till her hands turned blue.
MaddytheUnicorn t1_ist9u5g wrote
Yes, she could. She was a traveling lecturer and motivational speaker. Here’s the Helen Keller wiki.
[deleted] t1_ist9zxi wrote
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Itchy_Notice9639 t1_istai20 wrote
Aeosin15 t1_istap3d wrote
Actually, whoever is receiving serve would probably be scoring because the server would double-fault every time. Otherwise, the server would get lucky and hit one and probably score. Regardless, it would actually end up being a rather quick match, even though they'd end up playing first to 7 in every set.
Your joke is funny as hell, though.
Aeosin15 t1_istazh5 wrote
How do you know that's punishment? Maybe she likes it.
IndyPoker979 t1_istazq5 wrote
Did you know she had a horse?
Yeah neither did she.
TomAto314 t1_istbv4a wrote
I also like the alternate punchline: "Because she's dead."
yeet_king_preet t1_istc03o wrote
Then hellena cell.
the-fire-in-flame t1_istdalx wrote
>dark humor
I see you I see you
_arglebargle_ t1_istdhyn wrote
Helen Keller walked into a bar
Ouch
mastefka t1_istdlb9 wrote
How’d she burn the other side? They called back
Psycoticloonie t1_istdvf2 wrote
Wow. Dark.
[deleted] t1_isteahr wrote
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RutCry t1_istecko wrote
Why can’t Stevie Wonder see his friends?
Because he’s married.
FLY2WIN6 t1_istehby wrote
Helen Keller definitely doesn’t
Jay-Five t1_istejbx wrote
Two guys walk into a bar, you’d think the second guy would have seen it and stopped.
Aeshaetter t1_istejrh wrote
What was Helen Keller's favorite childhood game?
Musical chairs.
crono141 t1_isteprv wrote
You're not wrong, but this is a real hard concept for sighted people to understand.
jaymac1337 t1_isteskr wrote
The punchline I heard was, "they rearrange the furniture"
Aeshaetter t1_isteubl wrote
How did Helen Keller learn to play with herself?
Trying to read her own lips.
cheucklate t1_istf4my wrote
I never heard this joke.
Neither did she.
the-fire-in-flame t1_istfj0w wrote
Well yeah of course she's dead
IconXR t1_istfm3d wrote
It’s a Hellen Keller simulator. What’s confusing?
hitlersticklespot t1_istfv09 wrote
Why did Helen Keller’s dog run away? You would too if your name was Blahhhuuummmfgggjj
Thatcsibloke t1_istfvgl wrote
You’re going to hell for that. Have an upvote.
2723brad2723 t1_istgad5 wrote
I did not see that coming
Itchy_Notice9639 t1_istgrsq wrote
First time that i was hoping to get rickrolled , and instead i got a healthy dose of dark humour, nonetheless, thank you
Leftygoleft999 t1_isth1q8 wrote
Helen Keller worked at a bar.
The bar owner loved her work even though she routinely insulted every customer.
He said it’s a good thing to employ those with extreme diss abilities.
champsports13 t1_isth28l wrote
ProfessionalVolume93 t1_isthkxd wrote
This joke is a genuine antique. I wonder if it's gaining in value. No one under 50 would understand it.
[deleted] t1_isti10r wrote
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BigPanda71 t1_istigv0 wrote
She could “speak,” but conveniently only one person could understand and translate for her.
[deleted] t1_istjnxq wrote
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NarrativeNerd t1_istjsro wrote
Helen Keller was kicked off the basketball team.
She kept holding the ball because she was reading it.
[deleted] t1_istknye wrote
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Kyrroti t1_istkvte wrote
Could you put a blind and deaf child into a swingset with straps and stuff? I assume you could, but I think you’d want to somehow convey that’s it’s safe and intentional to the child.
[deleted] t1_istljvo wrote
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goaheadcarvell t1_istlkic wrote
My daughter and I drove past a sign in Virginia that said “School for the deaf and Blind”.
She read the words out loud.
I said, “what?”.
She read it again.
I said “where?”
Jacobbleedsblue t1_istlzv6 wrote
Good old Staunton
FabHckyBbe t1_istmc79 wrote
This is the one I was going to post. It’s my favorite.
mcarterphoto t1_istn5nm wrote
Why does Helen Keller masturbate with two hands?
She uses one to moan.
How did Helen Keller burn her fingers?
Trying to read the waffle iron.
seastories77 t1_istnue6 wrote
How did Helen Keller break her arm?
Reading a stop sign doing 60.
seastories77 t1_isto0pc wrote
Why were Helen Keller's legs yellow?
Her dog was blind too.
umangjain25 t1_istoe1o wrote
The joke is deleted now, what was the punchline?
ktsktsstlstkkrsldt t1_istofuh wrote
Removed? Really?
umangjain25 t1_istoljx wrote
The joke is deleted now, what was the punchline?
Flodo_McFloodiloo t1_istphom wrote
I saw this sort of punchline coming.
Because I’m not Hellen Keller.
darknsSs512 t1_istpqla wrote
So weird, like .. I have seen some dark shit on this sub, but jokes on blind people ? No no, here is the line.
chefriley76 t1_istpyna wrote
They told her to read the cheese grater.
goaheadcarvell t1_istuj11 wrote
Then into a chair. Then into a table.
umangjain25 t1_istulrb wrote
Ohhhhh, thanks!!
agentgalactic t1_istw1gl wrote
“Then into a chair and a table”
umangjain25 t1_istwgxl wrote
jabby88 t1_isu1lhn wrote
How is that a ".org"?
jabby88 t1_isu1ntm wrote
Try to picture what the back of your head sees.
Middleway_Natural t1_isu3dse wrote
She sure could moan
Loduwijk t1_isuefns wrote
Wow. I couldn't understand most of her words, but some of them were indeed decipherable. I don't think that was sufficient to live by, more like a first season student of a new language who couldn't get by in the country in question, but still... wow that's still impressive given her obstacles to overcome.
Amazing. Thank you for sharing.
fazbem t1_isujt9c wrote
Neither did she.
​
(You're welcome.)
Loduwijk t1_isup18i wrote
I've watched multiple videos of her "speaking" now. The only speeches that are understandable are the ones that are reenactments - that is, when it's not really her speaking. In the real videos sometimes a few words seem distinguishable, but generally it's not.
She had someone tell people what she was saying, using the excuse "for people with hearing disabilities who would have a difficult time hearing her". Really, it seems more like it's disingenuous.
She is amazing and overcame a mountain, and that's awesome. I still don't believe she was an audible speaker. That's completely fine. Millions of people have non-audible languages as their primary language.
[deleted] t1_isvadnt wrote
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[deleted] t1_isvahov wrote
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antimatterz3r0 t1_issqpya wrote
Here's a pretty dirty Hellen Keller joke. Q: Why does Helen Keller get off using only one hand? A: So she can moan with the other one.