Submitted by KarmicComic12334 t3_ydzq0q in Jokes
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Submitted by KarmicComic12334 t3_ydzq0q in Jokes
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So that’s… how you shut up an Italian? Hold their hands? Just like a person using sign language, you just turn the lights off? 😆
Edit: Come to think of it, Italians are speaking in sign language… kind of? So holding either’s hand would shut both up?
🤌
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As a Hispanic (similar but not the same), I've tried to talk with my hands in my pockets - it is nigh impossible.
Well, being Finnish myself… I usually keep my hands to the side. Then again, I barely talk. No, I’m not mute, just Finnish.
You may be joking but it actually kinda is
I actually saw a fender-bender accident in front of my little hotel in Italy
The next hour I just sat on my balcony and watched the show. The hand waving and arguing was insanly entertaining. Even people who weren't even there to see the accident would walk by and get involved in the arguing and gesticulating.
You should have joined in with random yells and hand gestures. Just go "eeeeeeeeeh", "ooooooooooh", "ueh" and do something with your hands. they would have been scared and confused and drop the argument.
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I’m walking down a road in Italy and I’m lost.
I ask a man carrying two watermelons under each arm which way to the train station.
He carefully works the first watermelon to the ground, and gently lowers the second watermelon to the ground.
He looks me dead in the eyes, throws up his hands and says “I don’t know”
If he had two watermelons under each arm, wouldn’t he have four watermelons?
As written... yes.
Probably meant to be written, "carrying two watermelons, one under each arm, ..."
Hard to explain without hands
RAW the Italian has 4 watermelons, but RAI it's 2
But do they count as improvised weaponry, or does carrying them mean he's unarmed?
I understood that reference!
Has Crawford tweeted about how many watermelons there are?
The mental image of a man carrying 4 watermelons under his arms, struggling, is just so simply hilarious.
Right? :-D
Nowhere does it say that the two watermelons he set down were from different hands... he could have freed one hand only... It takes only one hand to 🤌
But it says "throws up his hands"
Maybe he threw a watermelon with each hand when he did that
🤹♀️
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A woman travels to Italy for a work conference, so her husband drives her to the airport.
“Thank you honey,” she says, “Is there anything I can bring back for you?”
He laughs and says, “How about an Italian girl!”
When the conference is over, he meets her up at the airport and asks, “So how was the trip?”
“Very good,” she replies.
“And what about the present you were going to bring me?”
“Which present?” she asks.
“The one I asked for - an Italian girl!”
“Oh right, well I did what I could. We’ll just have to wait 9 months to see if it’s a girl.”
An italian guy picks up a blonde from the bar, He takes her home to make love to her, after finishing he asks her:" are you finnish?"
"No" she answers
Determined not to leave her unsatisfied, he makes love to her again this time with more intensity after half an hour he asks her again:"are you finnish?"
"No" she replies again
This time the Italian goes for an hour, he rolls up in bed covered in sweat and asks: "are you finnish?"
"No, I'm Norwegian" she answers
This only works if you read it to other people.
I assume Italians use hand gestures while talking🤔. Otherwise this went over my head
>ff. The others hear him scream. It goes on all day and all night. Finally as the sun rises, he is thrown back in the cell. The other two look at him with new found respect, but he says
>
>I wanted to tell them everything! But they wouldn't u
Yeah it's a common stereotype. Italians are very animated with their hands when they talk.
Not just a stereotype ... a lot of them (us) do it.
That's what a stereotype is...
A portrayal of a group of people with common characteristic and subsequent behaviours.
Whether factual or not, it's still a stereotype.
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That's why it's a stereotype. Sometimes you have them put on you... Sometimes you earn them.
https://www.youtube.com/shorts/9VcIRtI4wFA
this and similar videos
😂😂😂 that's funny
The real joke is that it included an British person, who presumably had an British accent
This is class
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🤌🤌🤌🤌
It's called gesticulation.
😂😂😂 oh!! Never heard that word. Sound like ejaculation
That checks.
I grew up with my Italian grandma. I have to move my hands to speak. Mom loved to complain that it was "too dramatic" and commented that she wanted to tie my hands to make it stop. I just told her that it'd be easier to sew my mouth shut.
What do you call an Italian with no arms?
A mute.
A harmless mute...
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I cooka da meatball
It's a spi-cy meat-ball.
How do you teach an Italian how to swim?
​
Ask them to explain something and throw them in the pool....
What do you call an Italian with no hands?? speech impediment.
🤏🤏
Ah, good old number 83. Classic.
I see what you did there....
83?
Hahaha thank you much. That's awesome. Wonder if that's a take on an old comedian's joke for comedians.
Why it is - an brit?
You don’t know the kings English?
Am I supposed to?
Great punch
LMAO AYO i lold way too hard at work.
Mamma Mia!
This would work for a deaf person that uses sign language too!
🤌🤌🤌
This is an amazing fact about Italians, please don't stop doing this
We Italians hate chatting on line. We gesticulate even as we type on the keyboard and it really takes a long time to write a message. It took me two hours just to write this.
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Damnit. This got removed.
?
It says "Rule 2" and "[Removed]". Unless that's the joke.
Was it a repost ?
I don't know. I haven't checked.
Lame!
Welcome to r/jokes
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Spaghetti 🤌
I givea you my award 🤌
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Make_the_music_stop t1_itv5ttc wrote
I went on a date with an Italian beauty. We had a great conversation until we held hands, then she was speechless.