A genie says to an alcoholic drifter, "You have three wishes, what would you like for your first wish"?

Submitted by StraightDildo t3_11swtpw in Jokes

Drifter: I would like a bottle of whiskey that is never empty

In a flash, the drifter is holding a bottle of whiskey. He takes a few gulps from the bottle, and in a few seconds, the bottle is full again.

Genie: What would you like for your other two wishes?

Drifter: I'll have two more of these bottles please.

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Comments

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Petal_Chatoyance t1_jcgvqjy wrote

"And that is how, after a drunken brawl in a train yard, the earth was flooded by an ever-growing mantle of whiskey, and why we now live at the bottom of a deadly global ocean of booze."

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JBluehawk21 t1_jch0wk2 wrote

You could make a fair amount of money off a bottle of alcohol that never goes empty.

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Advanced_Parsnip t1_jch9i11 wrote

Crap I remember Dave Allen telling this joke back in the 1970's

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infinit9 t1_jchf3n4 wrote

One to burn and produce electricity, one to use as a bottling source of my own line of whiskey.

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infinit9 t1_jchoi3y wrote

Replying to Eyre4orce (#2,248,153)

I'm a big fan of doing three things at once. While the bottle will never be empty, the mouth of the bottle still limits how much alcohol will flow through in a given amount of time.

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Khromm t1_jchudd4 wrote

So... no-one thinks the other two are for his friends?

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Professor-Clegg t1_jci1lne wrote

Replying to JBluehawk21 (#2,247,030)

“For my second wish I’d like half of a fair amount of money”

“For my third wish I’d like the other half of a fair amount of money”

Wow, you’re pretty clever! That big brain of yours isn’t just a hat rack!

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peter_the_martian t1_jci1nny wrote

There’s a lot of genie jokes on here lately so I’d just like to take this moment I ran into a real life genie.

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uncre8tv t1_jcilnoq wrote

I would re-sale the liquor and make enough to have a comfortable life. Then, upon my death, I would have the city install it as a public fountain, ever pouring for my fellow citizens.

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Lord_Havelock t1_jcj75nq wrote

Replying to jet_heller (#2,250,127)

No, because you'll eventually oversupply the market, and your product will lose value.

Of course you could still become very rich by selling it rationally, but try for infinite and you'll either crash your business, or the entire economy.

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SpareMind t1_jcjfqu8 wrote

Yes, perfect!! Just change the brand.

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kazey0shi t1_jcjhpez wrote

Just in case the first one breaks.

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JennyAndAlex t1_jcjibcx wrote

That was only two wishes. What about his third?

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Groinificator t1_jcjtcnt wrote

Replying to Lord_Havelock (#2,251,174)

I doubt an entire economy would crash over just an oversupply of alcohol

Also, isn't alcohol a pretty non-durable good? It's not like someone gets a single drink and is done. You can sell alcohol to the same person plenty of times...

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Tensor3 t1_jckcofa wrote

Well, you dont want to drink only 1 forever. The other two should be different varieties

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Lord_Havelock t1_jcktm1t wrote

Replying to Groinificator (#2,251,973)

Oh sure. Like I said you could absolutely make a ton of money. Just not infinite.

And as realistically unlikely as you alone crashing the global economy is, it would still happen before you got infinite money.

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