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Heavy_Jackfruit4736 t1_j59yjqp wrote

How do you stay positive and happy?

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CrohnsBoyTheThird OP t1_j59z2im wrote

I love this question.

I don't stay positive and happy.

I accept there will be times, like now, where I'm trapped and in pain and missing my family and my birthday, and unsure if I will live much longer and I try and let myself feel sad about that and scared about that.

I prefer to be strong rather than positive.

Courage is a strange thing - it's a behaviour not a innate trait. It's a dipping line that follows you through life, sometimes it's high sometimes it's low, but I always try and remind myself to pick it back up again once I'm finished feeling sad.

I think we have to allow ourselves to have our emotions - not just the good ones but the bad ones too. Once we stop resisting our "bad" emotions and let them come and do their job we take all the struggle out and we feel them for normal and natural durations.

Ultimately, I've had a wonderful life filled with love and weirdness and funniness so when I am low I try and remind myself of how blessed I've been, even if for a relatively short time and I let myself grieve.

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Heavy_Jackfruit4736 t1_j5a08nw wrote

Thank you for your answer. I really appreciate it. This is a great answer

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CrohnsBoyTheThird OP t1_j5a0tot wrote

Thank you very much for asking it. I enjoyed writing that.

If you liked it I'd recommend you have a little look at Stoicism. It's a philosophy that I try and live.

Avoid all the macho macho modern bastardisations of it and it's a beautiful heart warming philosophy that I credit with keeping me sane in these hospitals over the years.

Seneca is a great place to start especially "Letters from a Stoic". It's a collection of discovered letters between a famous philosopher and a young man he is mentoring, they dug them up from 2000 years ago and they still move me to tears. They talk about love, grief, anger, sadness, panic attacks and finding your place in the world. They read very modern and it shows you how little us Humans have changed since ancient times - we all still deal with the same issues.

Again, thank you for your lovely question.

much love.

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Conor_Stewart t1_j5dli1d wrote

Another slightly different perspective. I don’t stay positive or happy either but I tend to just become numb to it all, to the point where not much will affect me, just waiting for the next thing to go wrong. It probably isn’t too healthy a way to deal with it but after so much going wrong and cancelled plans and having to take time out of Uni, etc, it does seem like the easiest method. My IBD team have just decided to put me on a liquid diet though, so I will start that on Monday, it’s not something I want but it is just something I will have to get on with.

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CrohnsBoyTheThird OP t1_j5e1hph wrote

I'm starting my liquid diet tomorrow - feel free to reach out, much love

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